Some people think that people moving to a new country should accept new culture in the foreign country. Others think that they should live in a separate minority group with different lifestyle. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

#people #country #culture #minority #group #lifestyle

A section of society

believe

Change the verb form

believes

show examples

that those who decide to relocate to another

country

should adjust the

rituals

of the new

regions

Fix the agreement mistake

region

show examples

whereas

others believe that they should stay

their

Change preposition

in their

show examples

own group and live in a different way.

This

essay agrees that it is more beneficial for people who

accpet

Correct your spelling

the new

rituals

. It must be recognized that

public

Correct article usage

the public

show examples

should find a way to adjust to a bucolic's

vitual

Correct your spelling

virtual

regulation.

This

is because you can learn

new

Add an article

a new

show examples

language without

teacher

Add an article

a teacher

show examples

or you can make friends, make your own network in the new region and the most important reason is that you will have more job

oppertunities

Correct your spelling

opportunities

For instance

, people who want to grow their

carrier

Correct your spelling

careers

show examples

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

will have

greater

Add an article

a greater

show examples

chance if they know all the

rituals

of the new

country

. It is more easy to get jobs or

oppertunities

Correct your spelling

opportunities

which can be successful.

Nevertheless

, others say that it is more comfortable to live in a small group. It is

Wrong verb form

understood

show examples

understand

Wrong verb form

understood

show examples

when people cannot follow the

rituals

which may not

suitable

Add a missing verb

be suitable

show examples

Change preposition

for

show examples

with

Change preposition

for

show examples

their

Replace the word

beliefs

show examples

believes

Replace the word

beliefs

show examples

. The biggest reason is that they do not have to learn a new language, do not have to make friends. It is great for those who are

extrovert

Fix the agreement mistake

extroverts

show examples

However

, at least they should still show their respect

Change preposition

for

show examples

the differences.

For example

, a section of religious moved to

new

Add an article

a new

show examples

country

which have rules contrary to their

believes

Replace the word

beliefs

show examples

, the only they can do is

staying

Wrong verb form

stay in

show examples

their own group and adjust the rules but not follow

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

. The writer believes that society must respect the

underlyding

Correct your spelling

underlying

culture that existed for a long time when they

moeve

Correct your spelling

move

moved

to another

country

This

due to

the fact that you can experience new things which can help

Correct pronoun usage

you to

show examples

be successful and you can

also

get more benefit from the authority. Because of

this

public

Add an article

the public

show examples

should be

accpect

Correct your spelling

the new

rituals

so that they can develop and not be passive.

To sum up

, being

Wrong verb form

accepting

show examples

and

respect

Wrong verb form

respecting

show examples

new

Correct article usage

a new

show examples

culture when you decide to

moved

Change the verb

move

show examples

to another

country

necssary

Correct your spelling

necessary

Add the auxiliary verb

hasIt

show examples

also

been shown that you are a polite and flexible person.

Submitted by [email protected] on Sat Sep 02 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
37Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

347 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

assimilate
social cohesion
integration
navigating the job market
cultural preservation
sense of belonging
heritage
multiculturalism
cultural landscape
support network
transition
multicultural society
mutual respect
cultural identity

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5.5
band
Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skill. Do you agree or disagree?
It is true that education plays a crucial role in human lives. Some say that from all primary education to universities focus more theoretical-based on education instead of learning practical skill. I strongly agree with this statement because practical is required for getting employment and it affects innovative and creative ideas. This essay discusses it briefly for the following reasons.
4.5
band
In many countries, the number of animals and plant declining? Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved
The decline in the number of wild animals and trees causes stress for many countries and problems affecting the environment. In this essay, I will discuss about reasons which damage to the natural habitat.
5.5
band
Some people think that modern games can help children develop a wide range of skills, but others argue that traditional games can be much better for developing such skills. TO what extent do you agree or disagree?
Part of society believes that modern games can give rise to the development of a vast number of skills while others argue that traditional games do better in that aspect. In my conviction, these new games only develop computer skills while jeopardising the health of the individual whereas the old-time physical games, improve mental and physical skills a lot. Hence, this writer wholeheartedly agrees with the notion traditional games improve skills better than modernized games.
5.5
band
Some people say that the current obsession with technology and the internet means that we are creating a generation of people that have poor social skills.
Nowadays, some individuals believe that the excessive use of technology and internet-based platforms is resulting in the emergence of people with poor social skills. In my opinion, spending numerous hours on the Internet-related technologies such as Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, online shops and etc. can have a wide range of adverse effects on people’s social skills.
<4
band
Many countries have embraced tourism as a way to boost their economies and create jobs for local residents. However, some argue that tourism can have negative impacts on the environment and local cultures. What are advantages and disadvantages of tourism for a country.
Nowadays, many countries have embraced tourism as a way raise their economies and lucrative jobs for local humans but I think boost tourism year by year.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Some people think that people moving to a new country should accept new culture in the foreign country. Others think that they should live in a separate minority group with different lifestyle. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skill. Do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, the number of animals and plant declining? Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved

Some people think that modern games can help children develop a wide range of skills, but others argue that traditional games can be much better for developing such skills. TO what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that the current obsession with technology and the internet means that we are creating a generation of people that have poor social skills.

Many countries have embraced tourism as a way to boost their economies and create jobs for local residents. However, some argue that tourism can have negative impacts on the environment and local cultures. What are advantages and disadvantages of tourism for a country.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+