Nowadays , a lot of people enjoy watching sports on Tv . Do you think the advantages of watching sports on Tv outweigh the disadvantage?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Recently, a great number of individuals
are
Verb problem
have
show examples
preferred
on watching
Change preposition
to watch
show examples
sports
Use synonyms
events
Use synonyms
or matches on
TV
Use synonyms
. In my opinion, I consider that watching
sports
Use synonyms
on
TV
Use synonyms
can bring about more advantages for watchers compared to any problems it might bring. Despite the drawbacks below, I believe the benefits gained by watching
sports
Use synonyms
events
Use synonyms
on
TV
Use synonyms
are extremely useful.
Firstly
Linking Words
, watching
sports
Use synonyms
on
TV
Use synonyms
is much cheaper than
go
Wrong verb form
going
show examples
to the
stadium
Use synonyms
and
buy
Wrong verb form
buying
show examples
a ticket .
In other words
Linking Words
, the
viewer
Use synonyms
can save money by watching sporting
events
Use synonyms
at home.
For
Linking Words
example
Use synonyms
, the
viewer
Use synonyms
does not have to go to the
stadium
Use synonyms
and buy fuel for his car or a ticket, he can simply watch the sporting event on his
TV
Use synonyms
at home.
As a result
Linking Words
, saving money can occur by watching
sports
Use synonyms
events
Use synonyms
on
TV
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, watching
sports
Use synonyms
events
Use synonyms
can be more accurate and comfortable.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the watcher can watch comfortably and intelligibly by sitting on the sofa and turning on the air conditioner
instead
Linking Words
of sitting in the
stadium
Use synonyms
in a crowded and hot place.
Also
Linking Words
, watching sporting
events
Use synonyms
on
TV
Use synonyms
is more accurate and clear.
For
Linking Words
example
Use synonyms
, the watcher can see controversial or interesting moments on repeat more than once.
Accordingly
Linking Words
, through
TV
Use synonyms
, the
viewer
Use synonyms
can watch more clearly and accurately. Admittedly, there are some issues involved when
Use synonyms
viewer
Fix the agreement mistake
viewers
show examples
watching
Wrong verb form
watch
show examples
sports
Use synonyms
events
Use synonyms
on
TV
Use synonyms
. One problem is that might be
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of enjoyment.
Additionally
Linking Words
, people who watch the matches on
TV
Use synonyms
do not get enough excitement because they do not have the exhilaration and hustle
that is
Linking Words
on the stadiums.
For
Linking Words
example
Use synonyms
, watching sporting
events
Use synonyms
in the stadiums is made more exciting and exciting. Through encouragement, cheers, and chanting songs. Another negative aspect is health issues.
However
Linking Words
, spending long hours
matches
Change preposition
on matches
show examples
on
TV
Use synonyms
can have negative effects on physical health.
For
Linking Words
example
Use synonyms
, an inactive lifestyle and the possibility of obesity and eye fatigue.
Subsequently
Linking Words
, watching many matches on
TV
Use synonyms
can cause
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
health problems. In conclusion, viewers can get more enjoyment and excitement when watching it in the
stadium
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
of
Use synonyms
TV
Change preposition
on TV
show examples
.
Submitted by s_syedy on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction conclusion present
Ensure to present a clear introduction and conclusion. Your introduction briefly mentions the topic and provides your opinion, which is good. However, the conclusion is quite abrupt and doesn't effectively summarize your main points or restate your opinion.
logical structure
While your essay is logically structured, it would benefit from stronger transitions between your main points and better use of linking words to improve flow.
supported main points
Your main points are supported well with specific examples. However, consider diving deeper into each example to provide a more comprehensive explanation.
complete response
You have successfully highlighted both advantages and disadvantages of watching sports on TV, which shows a balanced approach to the topic.
relevant specific examples
Your examples are relevant and specific, particularly the references to cost-saving and comfort.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: