IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The most effective way to solve traffic and transport problems in the cities is to encourage people from the suburbs or the countryside to live in the cities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#traffic #transport #cities #people #suburbs #countryside
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The following essay discusses that
people
Use synonyms
 who live in the
countryside
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 should move to the
city
Use synonyms
 because it is one of the best ways
for solving
Change preposition
to solve
show examples
transportation
Use synonyms
 problems. I completely disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement because
people
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that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 live in the
cities
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 travel a lot, too. And that means they
also
Linking Words
 can cause different kinds of
traffic
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 problems. And moving all the citizens of
Add an article
the suburbian
show examples
suburbian
Correct your spelling
suburban
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 area seems an irrational idea to me because in
this
Linking Words
 case, more
people
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 will live in the
cities
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 and even more
people
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 will cause
traffic
Use synonyms
jams
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 and they will experience even more
transportation
Use synonyms
 problems. First and foremost, I do not agree with the idea of moving all the
people
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 to the
city
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 because I think that the
cities
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 would be overpopulated.
Therefore
Linking Words
, everyone will suffer from public
tansportation
Correct your spelling
transportation
 issues and the amount of
traffic
Use synonyms
jams
Use synonyms
 will increase dramatically, too. As an example, now
people
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 who live in the
cities
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daily
Rephrase
apply
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spend
few
Correct article usage
a few
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 hours in order to
arrive to
Verb problem
get
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 their job and so on. But after moving
people
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 to the
cities
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this
Linking Words
 amount of time will at least double.
Secondly
Linking Words
, everyone in the
city
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 uses lots of
transportation
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, too. In my opinion,
people
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 who live in the
countryside
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 travel to the
city
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 or use public transport way less.
Which
Correct pronoun usage
This
show examples
 means that citizens of the
city
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 should move to the
countryside
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 more. In
this
Linking Words
 case, way
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 would travel in the
city
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 itself.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
traffic
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jams
Use synonyms
 and public
transportation
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 issues will occur less.
To sum up
Linking Words
, I think that encouraging
people
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 from the
suburbian
Correct your spelling
suburban
show examples
 area to move to the
cities
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 will worsen the situation.
However
Linking Words
, if
small
Add an article
a small
show examples
 fraction of
people
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 who live in the
cities
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 would move to the
countryside
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, way
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
traffic
Use synonyms
jams
Use synonyms
 would occur.
Submitted by Ayan on

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task response
The response should clearly address the task by presenting a clear position and supporting it with relevant examples. It is important to consider both sides of the argument and provide a balanced view.
coherence and cohesion
The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion, and the logical structure of the essay needs improvement. The ideas are not always presented in a clear and cohesive manner. It is important to use cohesive devices to link ideas and paragraphs together.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • urbanization
  • overpopulation
  • infrastructure
  • public transport system
  • commute times
  • peak hours
  • density
  • urban infrastructure
  • sustainable living
  • satellite cities
  • digital solutions
  • remote work
  • regional lifestyle diversity
  • traffic congestion
  • suburban and rural areas
What to do next:
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