The most effective way to solve traffic and transport problems in the cities is to encourage people from the suburbs or the countryside to live in the cities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The following essay discusses that
people
who live in the countryside
should move to the city
because it is one of the best ways for solving
Change preposition
to solve
transportation
problems. I completely disagree with this
statement because people
that
live in the Correct pronoun usage
who
cities
travel a lot, too. And that means they also
can cause different kinds of traffic
problems. And moving all the citizens of Add an article
the suburbian
suburbian
area seems an irrational idea to me because in Correct your spelling
suburban
this
case, more people
will live in the cities
and even more people
will cause traffic
jams
and they will experience even more transportation
problems.
First and foremost, I do not agree with the idea of moving all the people
to the city
because I think that the cities
would be overpopulated. Therefore
, everyone will suffer from public tansportation
issues and the amount of Correct your spelling
transportation
traffic
jams
will increase dramatically, too. As an example, now people
who live in the cities
daily
spend Rephrase
apply
few
hours in order to Correct article usage
a few
arrive to
their job and so on. But after moving Verb problem
get
people
to the cities
this
amount of time will at least double.
Secondly
, everyone in the city
uses lots of transportation
, too. In my opinion, people
who live in the countryside
travel to the city
or use public transport way less. Which
means that citizens of the Correct pronoun usage
This
city
should move to the countryside
more. In this
case, way less
Change the quantifier
fewer
people
would travel in the city
itself. Therefore
, traffic
jams
and public transportation
issues will occur less.
To sum up
, I think that encouraging people
from the suburbian
area to move to the Correct your spelling
suburban
cities
will worsen the situation. However
, if small
fraction of Add an article
a small
people
who live in the cities
would move to the countryside
, way less
Change the quantifier
fewer
traffic
jams
would occur.Submitted by Ayan on
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task response
The response should clearly address the task by presenting a clear position and supporting it with relevant examples. It is important to consider both sides of the argument and provide a balanced view.
coherence and cohesion
The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion, and the logical structure of the essay needs improvement. The ideas are not always presented in a clear and cohesive manner. It is important to use cohesive devices to link ideas and paragraphs together.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
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