IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002.

The table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002.
#information #consumer #items #five #countries
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The table
revealse
Correct your spelling
reveals
 data about the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of national
consumerexpenditure
Correct your spelling
consumer expenditure
 by category in 5 different countries ( Ireland, Italy, Spain, Sweden and Turkey) in 2002.
Overall
Linking Words
, Turkey had the most
expenditure
Use synonyms
 consumers in the
case
Use synonyms
 of
food
Use synonyms
/ drink and
tobbaco
Correct your spelling
tobacco
 and
also
Linking Words
leisure
Use synonyms
/education,
while
Linking Words
 Italy had the most consumption in the
case
Use synonyms
 of clothing/footwear.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, Sweden had the
least
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
 proportion of
food
Use synonyms
 and clothes
expenditure
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 in the
case
Use synonyms
 of
clothing
Add a comma
,clothing
show examples
 the least
was belonged
Change to the active voice
belonged
has belonged
show examples
 to Spain. Turkey was the biggest consumer of the
food
Use synonyms
/ drink and
tobbaco
Correct your spelling
tobacco
 industry and
leisure
Use synonyms
/education with 32.14% and 4.35%,
while
Linking Words
 Italian citizens had the
most
Correct word choice
highest
show examples
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
expenditure
Use synonyms
 for clothing/footwear with 1.98%. Spanish people spent 18.8% of their
expenditure
Use synonyms
 on
Use synonyms
food
Correct article usage
the food
show examples
 category,
while
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 ratio was almost
one third
Add a hyphen
one-third
show examples
 and one
ninethfor
Correct your spelling
ninth for
 the
clothe
Correct subject-verb agreement
clothes
show examples
 and
leisure
Use synonyms
case
Use synonyms
 with 6.51% and 1.98% respectively. In Sweden, citizens spend 15.77% of their money
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
food
Use synonyms
/drink and tobacco,
whereas
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
percentage
Use synonyms
 was 5.40 and 3.22 in two other
categorizes
Replace the word
categories
show examples
. Irish people had the second
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
expenditure
Use synonyms
 rate in the
case
Use synonyms
 of
food
Use synonyms
 after Turkish people, with 28.91%.
Additionally
Linking Words
, In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Ireland, the least amount of money was spent
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
leisure
Use synonyms
 with 2.21%.
Submitted by shima.majidansari on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, expenditure, case, food, leisure with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumer spending
  • items
  • countries
  • comparison
  • overview
  • table
  • data
  • information
  • proportion
  • percentage
  • figures
  • categories
  • expenditure
  • purchases
  • spending habits
  • trends
  • average
  • highest
  • lowest
  • variation
  • pattern
What to do next:
Look at other essays: