IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Many feel that going to the gym is the best way to stay hit. Other think there are more effective methods. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#gym #methods
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Nowadays, humans are becoming to look after for health problems. So
people
Use synonyms
go
Wrong verb form
going
show examples
 to
Use synonyms
gym
Add an article
the gym
a gym
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 to keep fit is the best choice.
Whereas
Linking Words
 some others it is necessary to go to the
gym
Use synonyms
, but
also
Linking Words
 have
variety
Correct article usage
a variety
show examples
ways
Change preposition
of ways
show examples
 to do
this
Linking Words
. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will discuss both these points of view. On the one hand,
Use synonyms
gym
Correct article usage
the gym
show examples
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 keep fit. At the
gym
Use synonyms
, they have ample
trainer
Fix the agreement mistake
trainers
show examples
 to support and encourage
motivation
Replace the word
motivated
show examples
 students. In the company,
people
Use synonyms
 to
Use synonyms
gym
Add an article
the gym
show examples
 for two hours to burn calories
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
 to losing way and they feel comfortable,
relaxed
Correct word choice
and relaxed
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 after they
do
Verb problem
go to
show examples
Use synonyms
gym
Correct article usage
the gym
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.
Moreover
Linking Words
, they will a good health. The trainer can understand both students and their
body
Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
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 to make a suitable lecture.
However
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, some
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 can not afford numerous extravagant
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
 so
that is
Linking Words
 the drawback of
Use synonyms
gym
Add an article
the gym
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it is not the sole choice to make themselves. Many
person
Change to a plural noun
people
show examples
 will change or
Change preposition
at leas
show examples
leas
Correct your spelling
least
show examples
 alter their sports held in all life may be to refresh themselves. Meanwhile,
world
Add an article
the world
show examples
has
Verb problem
apply
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constantly
changed
Wrong verb form
changes
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 annual year,
why
Rephrase
so why
show examples
people
Use synonyms
must
Verb problem
apply
show examples
opt
the
Change preposition
for the
show examples
 lesson fitness they don’t like
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
 Even if mental health is one of the factorial main require
relax
Replace the word
relaxation
show examples
, recollection of mind to be immersed in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nature and become an athlete person hold themselves accountable.
To conclude
Linking Words
, mental fitness and physical body can be affected by a
heath
Correct your spelling
healthy
show examples
 lifestyle. So staying active all day
get
Verb problem
is
show examples
 a disaster.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Physical well-being
  • prime option
  • structured exercise routines
  • professional equipment
  • fostering an environment
  • motivation and discipline
  • counter-argument
  • outdoor activities
  • home workouts
  • cost-effectiveness
  • social and emotional satisfaction
  • team sports
  • hybrid approach
  • holistic approach
  • comprehensive benefits
What to do next:
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