Improvements in health, education, and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such areas. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#improvements #health #education #trade #development #nations #governments #responsibility #areas

It is widely believed that

health

, education, and trade are important to the development of the poor class, so the governments of the high class should support poorer

nations

such

areas. Personally, I strongly agree with

this

view for a variety of reasons. First of all, richer

nations

can send better paramedics and quality medical equipment to improve poor people's

health

. In fact,

this

team of doctors is equipped with knowledge and prepared modern medical machines to take care of patients, which leads to the improvement in

health

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and decreases the percentage of spread of diseases in poverty areas.

For example

, during Covid-19, some developed countries like America, England, France,... have supported lots of vaccines and medicines to other lower countries.

As a result

, the number of infections reduced a lot and kept the epidemic under control.

Furthermore

, money can be donated from richer

nations

to build schools for children. In fact, poor children have chances to go to school, meet quality teachers and easy to access knowledge.

This

means that these kids can approach good jobs in future and toward a better life. In conclusion, the upper class can help poorer

nations

improve their life in a lot of different ways like donating money to build schools, giving quality paramedics and advanced machines to take care of poor people's

health

, etc. In my opinion, it is essential for the governments of richer

nations

to help poorer

nations

improve

health

, education, and trade to have a better life.

Submitted by yeshomeclass on Thu Sep 07 2023

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

249 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Improvements in health, education, and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such areas. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Students should be allowed to choose academic courses or practical courses, e.g carpenters. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each other, while others think that people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties having enough sleep what are problems caused by lack of sleep? what can be done about this lack of sleep?

Some teachers think that international student exchange programs would be beneficial for all teenage school students. Do you think its advantages will outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each other, while others think that people have become more independent.  Discuss both views and give your own opinion.