IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The maps presents the developments which took place at Queen Mary Hospital between 1960 to 2000.

The maps presents the developments which took place at Queen Mary Hospital between 1960 to 2000.
The maps
presents
Change the verb form
present
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 the developments which took
place
Use synonyms
 at Queen Mary Hospital between 1960 to 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, a comparison of these maps illustrates a change from a common hospital
place
Use synonyms
 to
high quality
Add a hyphen
high-quality
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 treatment
centre
Use synonyms
. Since 1960 Queen Mary
hospital
Capitalize word
Hospital
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 was not that modern. There was just a hospital with some residential areas like
shopping
Add an article
a shopping
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 mall and
car
Correct article usage
a car
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 park. By 1980,the Queen Mary
health
Correct your spelling
Health Centre
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centre
Use synonyms
 had experienced dramatic changes. The Shopping
centre
Use synonyms
 was replaced,
it
Correct word choice
and it
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 started improving by building
Cancer
Correct article usage
a Cancer
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centre
Use synonyms
 and a pharmacy for the hospital. The most noticeable is they completely removed Farmland and built
nursing
Correct article usage
a nursing
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 school. In 2000, the medical
centre
Use synonyms
 decided to get rid of some car park
place
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, they added the rest of
car
Correct article usage
the car
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 park
place
Use synonyms
 to
nursing
Correct article usage
the nursing
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 school whilst demolishing it. The part of
removed
Correct article usage
the removed
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 nursing school was combined with
Cancer
Correct article usage
the Cancer
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centre
Use synonyms
.

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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words place, centre with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "presents" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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