Towns and cities are attractive places. Some people suggest the government should spend money putting in more works of art like paintings and statues to make them better to live in. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There has been a debate about whether more budget should be put
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
Correct article usage
the constructions
show examples
constructions
Fix the agreement mistake
construction
show examples
of art-related facilities, and some believe that
dong
Correct your spelling
doing
show examples
so can make towns or
cities
more livable places. I cannot agree with
this
statement, because there are many other areas that should be given priority to investment.
To begin
with traffic, for
cities
with millions of populations,
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
show examples
is as indispensable as the vessels to
human
Add an article
the human
show examples
body. The daily necessities of urban residents, convenient online shopping, efficient online meal ordering and so on all depend on the smooth logistics system. It can be imagined that in a crowded metro station, adding an accessible location is obviously
effective
Correct quantifier usage
more effective
show examples
than the murals to relieve the pressure of commuting hours. Next to afforestation,
similarly
, a green lung is essential to a contemporary city. Until an effective alternative energy is found, the air pollution caused by using fossil fuels will keep your breath hard and your vision limited. At present, the simplest and most effective approach to
reduce
Change the verb form
reducing
show examples
air pollution is greening, which is
reason
Add an article
the reason
a reason
show examples
why new construction subjects must ensure certainly
proportion
Correct article usage
the proportion
show examples
of planting areas.
In addition
, public green areas and
park
Fix the agreement mistake
parks
show examples
can provide opportunities for exercise, leisure, picnics and so on, which are
also
irreplaceable by art facilities. In conclusion,
although
art-related installations
such
as paintings and sculptures can make
cities
good looking
Add a hyphen
good-looking
show examples
, more investments should
put
Add a missing verb
be put
show examples
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
transportation and afforestation, which can keep
cities
healthy and energetic. Needless to say, if there is a sufficient budget, art should
also
be considered, after all, everyone likes a beautiful city to live in.
Submitted by 365038807 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: