IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Tourism is an ever growing industry. What benefits do you think tourism brings to individuals and society?

#tourism #industry #individuals #society
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Nowadays going to other
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
 and gaining more knowledge from there has been increasing for ten years. popular companies are
attracting
Wrong verb form
attracted
show examples
 to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tourism
Use synonyms
 despite
as
Change preposition
apply
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per
Change preposition
in
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 my perspective,
tourism
Use synonyms
offer
Change the verb form
offers
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more advantages not only
Use synonyms
people
Change preposition
to people
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 but
also
Linking Words
 community. In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
,essay
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i
Change the capitalization
I
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would
Wrong verb form
will
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 explain clearly about both points. There are numerous merits why exploration could be welfare for the person. First and foremost, having taken
Use synonyms
job
Add an article
a job
the job
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 in
this
Linking Words
 field can be easier than
Change preposition
in other
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other field
Change the wording
another field
other fields
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as
Correct word choice
apply
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if they
would
Verb problem
apply
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have
money
Use synonyms
 so they
were
Verb problem
can
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 live in better lifestyle.
Also
Linking Words
,
masses
Correct article usage
the masses
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 may
fell
Correct your spelling
feel
show examples
relax
Wrong verb form
relaxed
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 if they
will
Verb problem
apply
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have success in their life.
For instance
Linking Words
, in
india
Change the capitalization
India
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,
people
Use synonyms
 are facing stressful
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
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due to
Linking Words
 low income
as well as
Linking Words
 less opportunity to pass any entrance exam to get
success
Replace the word
a successful
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job
Use synonyms
hence
Linking Words
, going
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 different
journey
Fix the agreement mistake
journeys
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 and taking
Use synonyms
job
Add an article
a job
the job
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 from there must for the individual.
however
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 can learn distinct
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
show examples
 from there when they go to different overseas
in addition
Linking Words
, it must be fruitful for the crowd because they can use
anywhere
Correct pronoun usage
it anywhere
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 in their life. On the other side if
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 talk about the public how
tourism
Use synonyms
 can be
profit
Replace the word
profitable
show examples
 for them.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
government
Add an article
the government
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 can earn
money
Use synonyms
 from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tourism
Use synonyms
 and they may boost their
economy
Replace the word
economic
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 level as
growing
Correct article usage
a growing
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city
Fix the agreement mistake
cities
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 or
nation
Fix the agreement mistake
nations
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 will be
powerful
Correct quantifier usage
more powerful
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 than other countries if they have more
money
Use synonyms
 and
best
Correct article usage
the best
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 infrastructure.
Moreover
Linking Words
, they can make their own building to improve not only culture but
also
Linking Words
making
Verb problem
apply
show examples
roads in their society
Linking Words
due to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 can give more benefits than other things.
For example
Linking Words
, in Asia.
Use synonyms
people
Capitalize word
People
show examples
 go there to see different types of scenery and different
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
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 so, they give
money
Use synonyms
 for
ticket
Fix the agreement mistake
tickets
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 and it would be beneficial for
there
Correct your spelling
their
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 country.
in
Capitalize word
In
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 conclusion,
although
Linking Words
tourism
Use synonyms
are
Change the verb form
is
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 essential for every
Use synonyms
people
Fix the agreement mistake
person
show examples
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
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it has more advantages to
get
Wrong verb form
getting
show examples
Use synonyms
job
Add an article
a job
the job
show examples
 than
group
Add an article
the group
a group
show examples
.
Submitted by tanwarneha678 on

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