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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The chart below shows how frequently people in the USA ate in fast food restaurants between 2003 and 2013

The chart below shows how frequently people in the USA ate in fast food restaurants between 2003 and 2013
#people #usa #food #restaurants
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The chart illustrates how often American
people
Use synonyms
 ate in fast food restaurants in the
usa
Correct your spelling
US
 from 2003 to 2013. In general, a lot of
people
Use synonyms
frequency
Replace the word
frequently
show examples
of eating
Wrong verb form
eat
show examples
 at once a
week
Use synonyms
 and once or twice a month more than every day and never
did not eating
Verb problem
eat
show examples
people
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
 , the most of
people
Use synonyms
 almost 32 % of
people
Use synonyms
eat
Wrong verb form
ate
show examples
 once a
week
Use synonyms
 in 2003 but in 2006
people
Use synonyms
 who
eat
Wrong verb form
ate
show examples
 once a
week
Use synonyms
grown
Wrong verb form
grew
show examples
. In 2013 who eat once a
week
Use synonyms
decline
Wrong verb form
declined
show examples
Change preposition
by
show examples
25 percentage of 
people
Use synonyms
.
People
Use synonyms
 who
eat
Wrong verb form
ate
show examples
 every day
4
Add a missing verb
were 4
show examples
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
 in 2003, but  in comparison in 2003 more than a little bit 
grown
Wrong verb form
grew
show examples
 in other years.
People
Use synonyms
 who eat
never
Add a missing verb
are never
show examples
 approximately the same
of
Change preposition
as
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 who eat every day.
Submitted by mawka974 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, week with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Fast food consumption
  • Frequency
  • Dining trends
  • Demographic factors
  • Peak periods
  • Downward/upward trend
  • Lifestyle choices
  • Nutritional awareness
  • Economic impact
  • Health implications
  • Convenience foods
  • Eating habits
  • Statistical evidence
  • Year-over-year comparison
  • Fluctuation
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