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Writing Samples
Band 3

The table shows the percentage of journeys made by different forms of transport in four countries. The bar chart shows the results of a survey into var use.

The table shows the percentage of journeys made by different forms of transport in four countries. The bar chart shows the results of a survey into var use.
#percentage #journeys #forms #transport #four #countries #bar #results #survey #var
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The picture
illusterate
Correct your spelling
illustrate
illustrates
 the variety of methods used for
moveing
Correct your spelling
moving
 from one place to another in 4 countries.
Overall
, In
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
State
Fix the agreement mistake
States
show examples
 of America and
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom
car
 is the first choice for transportation,
while
 bicycle or foot and
puplic
Correct your spelling
public
 transport is the second one. Journeys made by
car
 account for
first
Change the article
the first
show examples
 option, like 90% in
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 and 72% in
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
,
while
 other means
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 touring
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
show examples
 a small
perecentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
.In
Correct article usage
the Netherlands
show examples
Netherlands
Add a comma
,Netherlands
show examples
 68% still
useing
Correct your spelling
using
 an
automtive
Correct your spelling
automobile
fallowed
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followed
show examples
 by 18%
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
 foot,
in
contrast
Add the comma(s)
,contrast
show examples
 Eighteen
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
uses
Correct subject-verb agreement
use
show examples
puplic
Correct your spelling
public
 transport and 11%
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
 foot in France. The
digram
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diagram
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demonstrate
Change the verb form
demonstrates
show examples
 the reason why people travel by
car
, 40% said because they don't have any other option,
while
 30% stated they need a
car
 to go to work and
ohers
Correct your spelling
others
 said it's more convenient, faster and it will help them during nightshifts.
Submitted by drsukainahh on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words car with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the first paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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