The table shows the percentage of journeys made by different forms of transport in four countries. The bar chart shows the results of a survey into var use.

The table shows the percentage of journeys made by different forms of transport in four countries. The bar chart shows the results of a survey into var use.
The picture
illusterate
Correct your spelling
illustrate
illustrates
the variety of methods used for
moveing
Correct your spelling
moving
from one place to another in 4 countries.
Overall
, In
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
State
Fix the agreement mistake
States
show examples
of America and
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
Kingdom
car
is the first choice for transportation,
while
bicycle or foot and
puplic
Correct your spelling
public
transport is the second one. Journeys made by
car
account for
first
Change the article
the first
show examples
option, like 90% in
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
and 72% in
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
,
while
other means
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
touring
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
show examples
a small
perecentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
.In
Correct article usage
the Netherlands
show examples
Netherlands
Add a comma
,Netherlands
show examples
68% still
useing
Correct your spelling
using
an
automtive
Correct your spelling
automobile
fallowed
Correct your spelling
followed
show examples
by 18%
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
foot,
in
contrast
Add the comma(s)
,contrast
show examples
Eighteen
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
uses
Correct subject-verb agreement
use
show examples
puplic
Correct your spelling
public
transport and 11%
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
foot in France. The
digram
Correct your spelling
diagram
show examples
demonstrate
Change the verb form
demonstrates
show examples
the reason why people travel by
car
, 40% said because they don't have any other option,
while
30% stated they need a
car
to go to work and
ohers
Correct your spelling
others
said it's more convenient, faster and it will help them during nightshifts.
Submitted by drsukainahh on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words car with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the first paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: