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Writing Samples
Band 5

The diagram shows how tea leaves are processed into five tea types. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram shows how tea leaves are processed into five tea types. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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Information about the production of five different types of
tea
Use synonyms
 is presented in a diagram.
Overall
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, there are three main stages of production for all five types of
tea
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, starting after the growth of the leaves.
In addition
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, four of the
tea
Use synonyms
 variants have two extra steps, each one with a unique combination of steps. The first main step, when the leaves have finished their development, is plucking them. After that, the plucked leaves should be withered. For the production of white
tea
Use synonyms
,
this
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 is the second to
last
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 step before the final one of oven drying.
In contrast
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, for all other types of
tea
Use synonyms
, two more actions are needed before reaching
this
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 final stage. For the making of green
tea
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, steaming follows the withering and
then
Linking Words
 the leaves get rolled. Rolling is used
also
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 for the making of oolong
tea
Use synonyms
 and large-leaf black
tea
Use synonyms
, both of which do not need steaming, but the next step varies. For the first one, only slight fermentation is used,
while
Linking Words
 the second is left to fermentate fully. Small-leaf black
tea
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 experiences full fermentation, but it is not rolled beforehand. ,
Linking Words
Instead
Add a comma
,Instead
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 it is crushed before the final stage of drying.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words tea with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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