Some people think that the most important thing about being rich is it gives a person the opportunity to help other people. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #person #opportunity

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Despite the argument of some

people

Use synonyms

that being affluent can create a chance for a person to help

others

Use synonyms

, I personally believe that being wealthy is not the most crucial thing for

people

Use synonyms

to help

others

Use synonyms

. There is a primary reason as follows. Helping

others

Use synonyms

hinges on

people

Use synonyms

's kindness but not their

finanical

Correct your spelling

financial

status

Use synonyms

. The true value of helping

people

Use synonyms

in need emphasizes the good personality and characteristic traits of the helpers regardless of

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

their backgrounds and social

status

Use synonyms

. Helping

others

Use synonyms

not only presents in monetary

donation

Fix the agreement mistake

donations

show examples

but

also

Linking Words

physical

Change the word

physically

show examples

assists someone in need is another

forms

Replace the adjective

form

show examples

of help. Even though

people

Use synonyms

without

Verb problem

do not have

show examples

adequate money to help

others

Use synonyms

, they can still take care of

others

Use synonyms

physically.

For instance

Linking Words

, children are motivated to become a volunteer to help

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

underprivileged

people

Use synonyms

to clean their houses and cook for them. It is undeniable that

people

Use synonyms

being wealthy can create more opportunities to help

others

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

who suffer from mental

illness

Fix the agreement mistake

illnesses

show examples

such

Linking Words

as depression,

insomina

Correct your spelling

insomnia

emotional

Correct word choice

and emotional

show examples

constraint

Fix the agreement mistake

constraints

show examples

are not looking for love and caring rather than monetary reward. Helping

people

Use synonyms

cannot be determined by someone's

finanical

Correct your spelling

financial

security.

Instead

Linking Words

, it should be based on our kindness and

awarness

Correct your spelling

awareness

sympath

Correct your spelling

sympathy

to give a hand to

others

Use synonyms

. More importantly, it should be the role of educational purpose for

our

Change the word

the

show examples

next generation. In conclusion, I will restate that helping

others

Use synonyms

should not be determined by

people

Use synonyms

's backgrounds or financial

status

Use synonyms

Instead

Linking Words

, helping

people

Use synonyms

with sincerity is far more important than one's economic

status

Use synonyms

Futhermore

Correct your spelling

Furthermore

, it can be detrimental to our next generation if we emphasize the importance of money to help

people

Use synonyms

Submitted by khannaughty26 on Wed Sep 13 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

268 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

wealthy
financial resources
philanthropy
charitable organizations
donations
fundraising
support
initiatives
contribute
fulfillment
purpose
selfless
altruistic
prioritize
personal gain

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments. Can experimentation on animals be justified? Are there any alternatives?
Some people advocate that using animals for experiments is a behavior that should be prevented. It is undeniable that stoping the use of animals for scientific testing is a commendable behavior that can generate positive outcomes for individuals and society. This behavior manifests social responsibility and humanitarian spirit. It can contribute to the resolution of social problems and the improve of the scientific research environments and the public health. For example, people are no longer limited to bloody scenes when doing scientific experiments. At the same time, This can make those who are afraid harming small animals and enjoy sciences more actively explore. However, we can use advanced electronic technology to simulate experiments, which also can reduce injuries to them. Meanwhile, This will guide people to have more correct values conception and respect for life.
5
band
The chats below show the percentage of students joining North West University.
The pie charts provide information about the proportion of students in different faculties and the regional distribution of art faculty students at North West University.
6.5
band
Some people think that university education should focus on skills for future employment. Others think academic study should be the only focus. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Right now, people are having a big debate about what universities should focus on in education. Some say that academic study should be the priority. In this essay, I will explain my opinion by looking at both sides of the argument.
7.5
band
It is a natural process for animal species to become extinct (e.g. Dinosaurs, dodos …) There is no reason why people should try to prevent this from happening. Do you agree or disagree?
While some hold the idea that the disappearance of animal creatures is inevitable as it is an essential part of nature, there is no need to try to save them from elimination. I completely disagree with this viewpoint as I believe people can create positive outcomes.
6.5
band
Nowadays people use bicycles less as a form of transport. Why is this the case? What can we do to encourage people to use bicycles more? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.
In the early days, people used to use bicycles from their homes to their workplaces and supermarkets.These days transport methods have changed abruptly due to the advancement of technology and people travel long distances to reach their workplaces.There are many options that can be adopted to motivate everyone to use bicycles such as providing jobs in local areas and building separate cycle pathways to avoid accidents.

Some people think that the most important thing about being rich is it gives a person the opportunity to help other people. Do you agree or disagree?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments. Can experimentation on animals be justified? Are there any alternatives?

The chats below show the percentage of students joining North West University.

Some people think that university education should focus on skills for future employment. Others think academic study should be the only focus. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

It is a natural process for animal species to become extinct (e.g. Dinosaurs, dodos …) There is no reason why people should try to prevent this from happening. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays people use bicycles less as a form of transport. Why is this the case? What can we do to encourage people to use bicycles more? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.