The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The diagram illustrates the manufacturing
process
Use synonyms
of
sugar
Use synonyms
cane
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in producing
sugar
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.
Overall
Linking Words
, there are seven stages of the production
process
Use synonyms
from planting the
sugar
Use synonyms
cane
Use synonyms
to the drying and cooling
process
Use synonyms
of the
sugar
Use synonyms
before it can be consumed. At the beginning of the
process
Use synonyms
,
sugar
Use synonyms
cane
Use synonyms
is planted and it will be letting them grow for 12 to 18 months.
Next,
Linking Words
the harvesting
process
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of
sugar
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cane
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with two options harvesting by traditional way or modern way using a machine.
Then
Linking Words
, the
sugar
Use synonyms
cane
Use synonyms
is crushed to become juice before the juice is purified by a limestone filter. Moving on to the next stage, before the juice turns into syrup, it experiences the evaporation
process
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using a heating method by the fire below the evaporator.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the next stage is separating
sugar
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crystals from syrup using a centrifuge machine.
Finally
Linking Words
, before
sugar
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can be consumed and distributed to consumers, the
sugar
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is dried and cooled, and placed in the tubular big can.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words process, sugar, cane with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • manufacturing process
  • sugar cane
  • harvesting
  • transporting
  • factory
  • crushing
  • extracting
  • juice
  • filtering
  • impurities
  • heating
  • evaporating
  • syrup
  • boiling
  • crystallizing
  • sugar
  • separating
  • drying
  • packaging
  • distribution
  • stage
  • process
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