Families who send their children to private schools should not be required to pay taxes that support the state education system. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?.

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It is argued that parents who have children attend
to
Change preposition
apply
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private
education
Use synonyms
don'
t
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need to be responsible for taxes that support the state
education
Use synonyms
system. I strongly agree with
this
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idea. There are many reasons why I concur with the point above.
Firstly
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, those kids
aren'
Verb problem
don't
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t
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received
Wrong verb form
receive
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any
education
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methods or facilities from public schools.
Secondly
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,
medium income
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medium-income
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families would have to tackle
a loads
Correct the article-noun agreement
loads
a load
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of money because they have to pay twice for
Correct pronoun usage
their children
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children
Change noun form
children's
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education
Use synonyms
.
Finally
Linking Words
, paying extra
fee
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fees
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for services that they don'
t
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get any benefits from can
causes
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cause
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against
government
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the government
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it can
be contributed
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contribute
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to
build
Wrong verb form
building
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a fair society and help households have a better quality of life - especially
low income
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low-income
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families .
Therfore
Correct your spelling
Therefore
, parents can only have to pay the cost of private
education
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. The rest of that money can be used to buy clothes, food, go on vacation .... or can be utilized for
there
Replace the word
their
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children to go to university.
Besides
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, for poor families,
this
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money is
also
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partly useful for them to pay bills. In conclusion, it would be great if governments didn'
t
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build some kind of laws that required parents who have kids attend to private
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
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have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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to pay taxes for
state
Add an article
the state
show examples
education
Use synonyms
system.
Submitted by anhnguhongmai on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • tax exemption
  • public education
  • private schools
  • collective responsibility
  • societal welfare
  • equitable access
  • financial burden
  • social cohesion
  • tax credits
  • vouchers
  • subsidies
  • state-funded
  • socioeconomic disparities
  • public vs. private sector
  • quality of education
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