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Band 1

Nowadays many young people are going to other countries for their future. What are the reasons for it? How it will be in 30 years?

#people #countries #future #years
People
seen
Add a missing verb
have seen
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 to change in
other country
Change the wording
another country
other countries
show examples
, for new
opportunies
Correct your spelling
opportunities
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
, others
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 improve
skills
Correct pronoun usage
their skills
show examples
 in the
lenguages
Correct your spelling
languages
language
 and others to get
better
Correct article usage
a better
show examples
 quality of life in
safe
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safety
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, health and
financial
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finances
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.
However
 young
people
has
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have
show examples
 a
lot
Add the preposition
oflot
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 challenges once they move to
other country
Change the wording
another country
other countries
show examples
, a
lot
Add the preposition
oflot
show examples
strees
Correct your spelling
stress
 and barrier
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the
lenguage
Correct your spelling
language
 are one of the big
problem
Change to a plural noun
problems
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 them causing health problems. In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
 over 30 years will be different and the young
people
 find
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 way to live close
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
lovers , the economic and
differents
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different
show examples
goberment
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governments
 help to have a global and
stardard
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standard
economic
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economy
show examples
 when
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
no
Add a missing verb
have no
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 need to find other
opportunies
Correct your spelling
opportunities
 in
different
Add an article
a different
show examples
place
Fix the agreement mistake
places
show examples
.
Submitted by mrociorm22 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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