The diagram below shows the plan of a library in 2001 and 2009. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows the plan of a library in 2001 and 2009. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The pictures illustrate different
design
Fix the agreement mistake
designs
show examples
of library planning in 2001 and 2009,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
which contain
list
Add an article
a list
the list
show examples
of
room
Fix the agreement mistake
rooms
show examples
and
facilities
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
ground
Add an article
the ground
show examples
floor.
Overall
, the main
differencies
Correct your spelling
difference
differences
is in
Correct article usage
the numbers
show examples
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
of
book
book’s
Change noun form
book
show examples
planning, which is
in
Change preposition
that
show examples
2009
Correct article usage
the 2009
show examples
design
contain
Correct subject-verb agreement
contains
show examples
more variated
book
storage than in 2001
design
.
Furthermore
, the
facilities
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased in 2009
which
Correct your spelling
with
show examples
more
engage
Replace the word
engagement
show examples
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
technology, in 2001 it is
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
facilities
. As can be seen from the pictures,
plan
Correct article usage
the plan
show examples
of
library
Add an article
the library
a library
show examples
in 2009
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
more
book
storage
depend
Wrong verb form
depending
show examples
on the studies, I.e. : history, fiction,
self help
Add a hyphen
self-help
show examples
, kitchen, economics, law and children’s
book
Fix the agreement mistake
books
show examples
. There
also
Add a missing verb
are also
show examples
facilities
such
as computers and Films and DVDs which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
put in the main room. There is
also
a
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
area in front of
children’s
Correct article usage
the children’s
show examples
book
.
However
, in 2001 the
design
of
library
Add an article
the library
show examples
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
considered more simple. It has three main
book
Change to a plural noun
books
show examples
vary
Verb problem
apply
show examples
,
such
as
self help
Add a hyphen
self-help
show examples
, history and fiction. The main room only
contain
Change the verb form
contains
show examples
a page that can be put some newspaper and periodicals.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, such".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words design, facilities, book with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: