IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

what are the differences between working for others and running your own business?

#differences #business
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Numerous people prefer to set
their
Change preposition
up their
show examples
 own
business
Use synonyms
 rather than involving themselves in a company or organization.
Although
Linking Words
 there are some adversities in being self-employed, I believe that running a
business
Use synonyms
 for yourself has a greater value than working for others. One major advantage is the flexible working hours that the person can enjoy. When a person owns a
business
Use synonyms
, can schedule programs
according to
Linking Words
the
Change the word
their
his
her
show examples
 personal interest
due to
Linking Words
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of
needs
Fix the agreement mistake
need
show examples
 to respond to the employer. Another significant advantage is that an individual can work independently and peacefully as a
business
Use synonyms
 owner.
For instance
Linking Words
, some people are not good at working under the supervision of a manager, as they feel pressured which results in impeding their mental peace. In spite of high financial risk, running a
business
Use synonyms
give
Change the verb form
gives
show examples
 a person’s chance to make more money than a time employed by someone else. As a
business
Use synonyms
 owner, people should
involve
Wrong verb form
be involved
show examples
 in all aspects of
business
Use synonyms
that
Linking Words
is time consuming
Verb problem
are time-consuming
show examples
 and
needs
Correct subject-verb agreement
need
show examples
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
accurate planning. Contrary to
this
Linking Words
 aspect of the matter, working for others solely
concern
Correct subject-verb agreement
concerns
show examples
 the employees with the tasks assigned
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 them.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
being
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
self-employment can be significantly stressful and risky
Linking Words
by
Change preposition
in
show examples
 comparison with working for
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
.
Submitted by TUTOO on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: