IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and amount of time spent doing house work in households in one country between 1920 and 2019.

The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and amount of time spent doing house work in households in one country between 1920 and 2019.
#show #changes #ownership #appliances #amount #time #house #work #households #country
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The given statement shows alternative ownership of electrical
appliances
 and
amount
Correct article usage
the amount
show examples
 of time
spend
Change the form of the verb
spent
show examples
 doing housework in households in one country from 1920 to 2019.
As
Change preposition
From
show examples
 an
overall
view
Add a comma
,view
show examples
 it can be seen that
percentage
Correct article usage
the percentage
show examples
 of households with electrical
appliances
using
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
 between the years
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1920 to 2019.
Washing
Add an article
The washing
show examples
machine
 was highly
Using
Wrong verb form
Used
show examples
 in 1920 No one used
refrigerator
Correct article usage
a refrigerator
show examples
.All the electrical
appliances
 were Using
same
Change the article
the same
show examples
percentage
 in 1940.But
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
year
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1960refrigerator were
using
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
 so huge
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the same
year
 washing
machine
Fix the agreement mistake
machines
show examples
 and vacuum
cleaner
Fix the agreement mistake
cleaners
show examples
 used 70
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
.In the
begging
Correct your spelling
beginning
show examples
 of 2000 vacuum
cleaner
Fix the agreement mistake
cleaners
show examples
 and
refrigerator
Fix the agreement mistake
refrigerators
show examples
 used 100
percentage in
Correct your spelling
percent, while
 other hand washing
machine
Fix the agreement mistake
machines
show examples
 only used 70
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
.
at
Capitalize word
At
show examples
 the end of
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
2019 both
refrigerator
Fix the agreement mistake
refrigerators
show examples
 and vacuum
cleaner
Fix the agreement mistake
cleaners
show examples
used
Add a missing verb
were used
show examples
 fully but washing
machine
Fix the agreement mistake
machines
show examples
 used
73
Rephrase
only 73
show examples
percentage
 only. households with electrical
appliances
 worked 50 hours per week in 1920.
year
Capitalize word
Year
show examples
 by
year
 electrical
appliances
Fix the agreement mistake
appliance
show examples
 usage would be reduced.
At the end
 of
year
Add a comma
,year
show examples
 10 hours per week
only
Add a missing verb
were only
show examples
 used in 2019.
Submitted by insighttribez on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words appliances, percentage, machine, year with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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