Graph that shows online sale for retail sectors in New Zealand

The pie chart points out the percentage of online shopping

sales

for retail in New Zealand between the years 2003 and 2013. It is observable from the chart that the main shopping auction retail sector was registered for travel and film music for both years. There is a notable change in the travel economic retail region with a reduction in 2013. Looking at the detail of the charts,

while

the travel zone represented 36% of purchases in 2003,

this

region suffered a reduction in wholesale in 2013 with 29%.

In contrast

, the chart shows an increase in the film/music zone by 2013. Even though by 2003

this

sector used to have one of the lowest levels, followed by the books area, by 2013 film/music region presented a rise in

sales

with 33 %. The graph

also

shows a quiet increase in book zone retail

sales

Whereas

by 2003 the sector was represented by 19% of

sales

, in 2013 the

sales

rose by 22%.

Submitted by adibaerfan2 on Wed Sep 20 2023

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words sales with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 4 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "represented" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "reduction" was used 2 times.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

163 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Graph that shows online sale for retail sectors in New Zealand

IT IS GENERALLY ACCEPTED THAT EXERCISE IS GOOD FOR CHILDREN AND TEENAGERS. THERFORE, PHYSICAL EDUCATION AND SPORT SHOULD BE COMPULSORY FOR ALL STUDENTS IN ALL SCHOOLS. WHAT DO YOU THINK ?

you are looking for a full time job. write a letter to an employent agency. introduce yourself explain what sort of job you would like say what experience and skills you hav

Schools should focus on academic success and passing examinations. Skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodwork should not be taught at school as it is better to learn these from family and friends. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Public celebrations (such as national days, festivals etc) are held in most countries. These are often quite expensive and some people say that governments should spend money on more useful things. Do you agree or disagree?

Many teenagers are encouraged by their parents to get a part-time job. What are the advantages and disadvantages of teenagers working part-time?