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Band 2.5

Some people believe that the government should support people who work for arts, such as painting, theatre or music financially. Some people believe that they should find other financial support resources instead. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #government #support #work #arts #theatre #music #resources
There are differing opinions as to whether
artists
 should be financially supported by the
government
 or
they
Correct word choice
if they
show examples
 should look for private sponsorship. It seems to me, both of the financial sources should be considered for a rainy day. The option of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
government
 support for
artists
 is quite justifiable
due to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 some reasons.
Firstly
,
according to
 the fact that art is one of the economic drivers, it can greatly contribute to
development
Add an article
the development
show examples
 of the economy and increase the level of people’s lives.
For example
, when
artists
 put their works of art on display in exhibitions or participate in world competitions, they can draw people’s
attentions
Fix the agreement mistake
attention
show examples
 and encourage them to buy the artworks.
In addition
, arts and
artists
 promote the cultural identity of a nation.
This
 would promise a rich and vibrant society and have numerous advantages for the
government
. I think that
such
 a society would certainly create some effective interactions between individuals and the
government
. So, for the reasons mentioned, the authority is expected to fund their work.
Submitted by sajad_danesh66 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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