IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. The number of people with different

#summarise #information #features #comparisons #people
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is a line graph to illustrate the changes that
people
Use synonyms
’s working time from 1998 to 2004. And the table displays the
number
Use synonyms
 of holidays by
years
Fix the agreement mistake
year
show examples
 from 1998 to 2004. In summary,
for
Change preposition
from
show examples
 the line chart diagram,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who
work
Use synonyms
 16-31
hours
Use synonyms
 and 32-45
hours
Use synonyms
 showed
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 upward trend from 1998 to 2004.
In addition
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who
work
Use synonyms
 over 45
hours
Use synonyms
 showed a downward trend in the same period. To the details, for the line graph, it is obvious that the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who
work
Use synonyms
 16-31
hours
Use synonyms
less
Add a missing verb
is less
show examples
 than the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who
work
Use synonyms
 32-45
hours
Use synonyms
 in 1998, about 0.5
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
people
Use synonyms
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, as can be seen
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who
work
Use synonyms
 16-31
hours
Use synonyms
 and 31-45
hours
Use synonyms
 are same in 1999, about 10.5
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
people
Use synonyms
. It could be noticed that the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who
work
Use synonyms
 16-31
hours
Use synonyms
 increased slightly from 1998 to 2004, and reached a peak of 11.2
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 in 2004. it is worth noticing that the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who
Use synonyms
work
Wrong verb form
worked
show examples
 32-45
hours
Use synonyms
 less than
people
Use synonyms
 who
Use synonyms
work
Wrong verb form
worked
show examples
 16-31
hours
Use synonyms
 in 2004,
about
Add a missing verb
was about
show examples
 0.8
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
. And it is interesting to note that the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who
work
Use synonyms
 over 45
hours
Use synonyms
had
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
 steadily fluctuation.
For
Change preposition
From
show examples
 the table, we can see that the
number
Use synonyms
 of holidays showed
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 upward trend from 1998. in conclusion, it is clear from the
date
Correct your spelling
data
show examples
that the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who
work
Use synonyms
 16-31
hours
Use synonyms
 and 32-45
hours
Use synonyms
 climbed slowly from 1998 to 2004. And the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who
work
Use synonyms
 over 45
hours
Use synonyms
had
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
 rapid change.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
according to
Linking Words
 the table, the
number
Use synonyms
 of holidays went up
mildly
Rephrase
slightly
show examples
from 1998.
Submitted by 1247953979 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: