IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people believe that all children should have a pet or an animal to look after. Other people disagree, however, saying that this depends on a child’s circumstances. Consider these opposing views, and give your own opinion.

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It is believed that
pets
Use synonyms
 play an important role in affecting
children
Use synonyms
’s
development
Use synonyms
;
thus
Linking Words
,
children
Use synonyms
 are suggested
owning
Change the verb form
to own
show examples
 a
pet
Use synonyms
 to take care
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
.
While
Linking Words
 I understand that critics’ view
is
Verb problem
does
show examples
 not to apply
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
all
children
Use synonyms
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
depending on
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
certain situations of a
child
Use synonyms
, I believe that a recommendation of having a
pet
Use synonyms
 is considered
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a better option since the benefits of growing up with
pets
Use synonyms
 still far outweigh the drawbacks. On the one hand, there are two main reasons why people might disapprove of the suggestion that all
children
Use synonyms
 should have a
pet
Use synonyms
 to look after. The first objection is some families cannot afford a
pet
Use synonyms
 for their
children
Use synonyms
due to
Linking Words
 financial difficulty. In specific, raising a
pet
Use synonyms
 requires a huge amount of money, which might hurt one’s budget significantly.
For example
Linking Words
,
according to
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
recent research, the annual expense for a dog owner is above 1,200 USD
due to
Linking Words
 food and veterinary care. The other argument is that having
pets
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 some drawbacks for
children
Use synonyms
. In
such
Linking Words
 a circumstance, a
child
Use synonyms
 spends so much time with their furry hair that they do not have
friends
Use synonyms
 at school.
This
Linking Words
 was indicated by
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
research conducted by Harvard Business Review, which illustrated that when a kid puts all his/her focus on a
pet
Use synonyms
, they do not see the necessity of making
friends
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, I would
also
Linking Words
 argue that having
pets
Use synonyms
, especially for
children
Use synonyms
,
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 still beneficial and necessary in
almost
Correct your spelling
most
show examples
 circumstances. In specific,
pets
Use synonyms
 support the full
development
Use synonyms
 of a
child
Use synonyms
, both mental and physical
development
Use synonyms
. Studies show that
pets
Use synonyms
 are able to guide
Use synonyms
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
 emotional adjustments and relationship enhancement.
For instance
Linking Words
, a
child
Use synonyms
 knows how to make
friends
Use synonyms
, respect their
friends
Use synonyms
, and maintain their relationship since he/she already has
this
Linking Words
 “experience”, which is a strong bond between him/her and a
pet
Use synonyms
.
Besides
Linking Words
, playing with
pets
Use synonyms
 fosters
children
Use synonyms
’s physical growth, which
fulfills
Change the spelling
fulfils
show examples
 the total
development
Use synonyms
 of a
child
Use synonyms
. Particularly, thanks to the playtime between
children
Use synonyms
 and their
pets
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supports
Change the verb form
support
show examples
 some physical changes
such
Linking Words
 as height and muscles.
Although
Linking Words
 there might be some critical opinions
for
Change preposition
about
show examples
 all
children
Use synonyms
 having
pets
Use synonyms
, from the argument mentioned above, I still believe that
children
Use synonyms
 should
once
Rephrase
apply
show examples
have
pets
Use synonyms
 to grow up with.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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