IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The line graph below shows the average monthly temperatures in three major cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The line graph below shows the average monthly temperatures in three major cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.
#minutes #line #temperatures #three #cities #summarise #information #features #comparisons
the given line graph depicts information about the temperatures of three major cities at different months of the year.
To begin
 with, it is quite evident from the line graph, that the
temprature
Correct your spelling
temperature
 in Paris and Dubai is 5
degree
Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
show examples
celsius
Capitalize word
Celsius
show examples
 and 18
degree
Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
show examples
celsius
Capitalize word
Celsius
show examples
 in the
month
 of January respectively.
Then
 it shows a gradual increase in
temprature
Correct your spelling
temperature up to
upto
 the
month
 of July in these cities and reaches
upto
Correct your spelling
up to
 20 and 35 respectively. Later on, a slight increase in
temprature
Correct your spelling
temperature
temperatures
 in Dubai can be seen between July to August but
Paris
Change noun form
Paris's
Pari's
show examples
temprature
Correct your spelling
temperature
 remains levelled off. After that, there is a gradual decrease which is clearly seen
upto
Correct your spelling
up to
 December for both of these cities.
On the other hand
,
Correct article usage
the temprature
show examples
temprature
Correct your spelling
temperature
temperatures
 in Sydney is around 24 degrees
celsius
Capitalize word
Celsius
show examples
 in the
month
 of January and
then
 it decreases moderately and reaches
upto
Correct your spelling
up to
 13 degrees
celsius
Capitalize word
Celsius
show examples
 in the
month
 of July. After that, it increases again gradually and reaches
upto 23-degree
Correct your spelling
up to 23 degrees
celsius
Capitalize word
Celsius
show examples
.
overall
,
Correct article usage
the temprature
show examples
temprature
Correct your spelling
temperature
 of Paris and Dubai shows the same trend in the given time period but Sydney is the converse of it.
Submitted by engr.anees752 on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words temprature, celsius, month, upto with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reaches" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradual" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • average monthly temperature
  • major cities
  • trends
  • temperature changes
  • comparisons
  • yearly pattern
  • geographical location
  • climate zones
  • significant variations
  • notable differences
  • peak temperatures
  • lowest temperatures
  • fluctuations
  • seasonal changes
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