The chart below show the expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010.

#show #expenditure #two #countries #consumer #goods

The diagram demonstrates the expenses on consumer goods by two different nations in the year 2010. It is immediately apparent that the United

Kingdom

spent extra money on more items than

France

did. Cars were by far the commodity that both countries spent much on. Whilst the United

Kingdom

spent 450,000 pounds Sterling on cars,

France

paid 50,000 less of the amount used by the United

Kingdom

at 400,000 pounds sterling.

Similarly

, books and cameras were purchased in the United

Kingdom

than

Rephrase

rather than

show examples

France

. Whilst a little over 350,000 was used for cameras in the United

Kingdom

, a little less than half of

this

amount was spent on cameras in

France

However

, computers and perfumes were patronised more in

France

than in the United

Kingdom

at 380,000 and 200,000 pounds Sterling respectively. Meanwhile, 350,000 and 140, 000 were used on computers and perfumes in the United

Kingdom

Submitted by nmaureen03 on Sun Sep 24 2023

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words kingdom, france with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

147 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The chart below show the expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010.

In the past, most people used to travel to their place of work. With increased use of computers, the internet and smartphones, more and more people are starting to work fro home. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development?

Some children spend hours everyday on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situation?

Innovation is often driven by the pursuit of profit and economic growth . However , some argue that it should prioritize addressing social and environmental issues .