The line graph below shows the average monthly temperatures in three major cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph below shows the average monthly temperatures in three major cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The line chart illustrates the monthly change in temperatures in
Paris
Use synonyms
,
Dubai
Use synonyms
and Sydney. From an
overall
Linking Words
perspective, it is evident that
Paris
Use synonyms
has the lowest average
temperature
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
the climate in
Dubai
Use synonyms
is mostly hot over the months. In January,
Paris
Use synonyms
is reported to have the lowest
temperature
Use synonyms
at 5
Celcius
Use synonyms
,
while
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Dubai
Use synonyms
is warmer at 18
Celcius
Use synonyms
. Sydney has the warmest January at 24
Celcius
Use synonyms
. The climate in
Paris
Use synonyms
is favourable since continually increases to July and reaches a peak at 20 degrees in August. In fall and winter, the Parisians suffer from cold weather, significantly at 5 degrees in December. The
temperature
Use synonyms
in
Dubai
Use synonyms
is mostly warm over the year and reaches its hottest month in August at 35
Celcius
Use synonyms
before dropping to 23 degrees in December.
Lastly
Linking Words
, people living in Sydney have a cool summer with the lowest
temperature
Use synonyms
at 13 in July and slightly warmer to the end of the year at 24
Celcius
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by mtri28899 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words paris, dubai, temperature, celcius with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "reaches" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • average monthly temperature
  • major cities
  • trends
  • temperature changes
  • comparisons
  • yearly pattern
  • geographical location
  • climate zones
  • significant variations
  • notable differences
  • peak temperatures
  • lowest temperatures
  • fluctuations
  • seasonal changes
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