many people work long hours . leaving very little time for leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages ?

Hobbies are very important for an individual to lead a fulfilling life. The question of whether working long
hours
is beneficial for
people
has sparked a huge debate. As every coin has both sides , the current situation which is very common among youngsters has its own pros and cons.
This
essay will discuss
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
both the issues and provide my final view. On the one hand, there are quite a number of
people
who are
workaholic
Fix the agreement mistake
workaholics
show examples
. They love spending their
time
working and contributing something to the organization.
Consequently
, they are rewarded with
self satisfaction
Add a hyphen
self-satisfaction
show examples
and immense respect from their colleagues.
For instance
, I had a colleague of mine , who was extremely good at his tasks and worked longer
hours
. He is a software engineer and because of his hard work and commitment , he has become the director of our company at a very stage. He now leads a lavish life and helps a lot of poor
people
.
This
shows that spending longer
hours
at work is not bad
instead
, it elevates your position in the corporate world at an early stage.
On the other hand
, there is a section of
people
, who require leisure activities to help them destress and detox themselves.
Furthermore
, it helps them escape
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
the problems and
polictics
Correct your spelling
politics
of office.
For example
, I am
software
Add an article
a software
show examples
engineer by profession and I
am learn
Change the verb form
am learning
show examples
classical music to enjoy my spare
time
. Music has helped me heal my soul and saved me from depression.
Additionally
, I travel a lot and
this
helps me detox my mind and I get to meet many new kinds of
people
. The above free
time
work
ahd
Correct your spelling
has
helped me perform better at contribute my best to the organization.
To conclude
,
Its
Replace the word
It's
it is
show examples
very important to say that working extra
hours
has its own advantages and disadvantages and it depends on
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
individual. But, I strongly believe that free
time
tasks should be done to help you
decluster
Correct your spelling
declutter
your head and think straight.
Submitted by shreyagr1209 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-life balance
  • mental well-being
  • burnout
  • stress relief
  • productivity
  • economic growth
  • career progression
  • skill enhancement
  • quality time
  • financial security
  • leisure activities
  • physical health
  • personal relationships
  • stress-related illnesses
What to do next:
Look at other essays: