IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

You would like to rent a car for a holiday. Write to the car rental agency. In your letter •Explain what type of car you would like •Give details of when you would like the car • Request more information about the cost You do NOT need to write any addresses.

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Dear Sir, I am writing express my ideas about wanting to rent a
car
Use synonyms
 in your company. I want a
car
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 that can
sit
Verb problem
seat
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 seven people.Because I will be
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
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 to Phoenix Ancient Town with my
my
Remove the redundancy
apply
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family members on next Saturday. I
also
Linking Words
 want to
car
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 with
large
Correct article usage
a large
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 space and high seat
confort
Correct your spelling
comfort
.
On
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One
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 of the main
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
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 is that my grandmother is very old, and I want her to enjoy
the
Correct article usage
a
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 good time with our family
while
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maintain
Change the verb form
maintaining
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 a relaxed and good physical condition.
In addition
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, I hope to have the
car
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 delivered to 156 Yilin Avenue next Friday, as I need to pack my luggage in advance.
Moreover
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, I expect that its oil consumption spend is slower
becausue
Correct your spelling
because
 I don’t want to spend too much time going to the gas station. Meanwhile, I would like to know if the cleaning cost of the
car
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 needs to be paid extra, or if there will be a discount on the next
car
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 rental.
Lastly
Linking Words
, I look forward to hearing from you, and if you have any
further
Linking Words
informantion
Correct your spelling
information
, please do not hesitate to contact me. Yours faithfully, Xiyue Tang

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Clarity
Try to ensure clarity and precision in your sentences. For example, 'I am writing express my ideas about wanting to rent a car in your company' could be more directly stated as 'I am writing to request a car rental from your company.'
Organization
Consider using paragraphs to organize your content for better readability. Start a new paragraph for introducing different requests or aspects of your inquiry, such as the type of car, rental period, and questions about costs.
Accuracy
Be attentive to grammatical accuracy and word choice. For instance, 'oil consumption spend is slower' could be revised to 'I am looking for a car with low fuel consumption.'
Tone
The letter is polite and expresses the requests clearly, making it easy for the recipient to understand the main points.
Closing
The closing of the letter is appropriately formal and polite, setting a good tone for professional communication.
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