The diagrams below show the stages and equipment used in the cement-making process, and how cement is used to produce concrete for building purposes.

#diagrams #show #stages #equipment #process #cement #purposes

The presented illustration of the process

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

demonstrates how to make

cement

and how

from

Change preposition

apply

show examples

cement

produce

Correct subject-verb agreement

produces

show examples

gravel

Overall

, the process requires 7 steps, the first

stage

is putting limestone and clay into

crusher

Add an article

the crusher

a crusher

show examples

, and the

last

stage

is making

gravel

Change preposition

with

show examples

concrete

Correct article usage

a concrete

show examples

mixer

. It can be clearly seen that

first

Correct article usage

the first

show examples

stage

is pass

Wrong verb form

passes

show examples

limestone and clay through

crusher

Add an article

a crusher

the crusher

show examples

after

Correct word choice

and after

show examples

that

came out

Verb problem

the

show examples

thing (powder) will pass through

mixer

Add an article

the mixer

a mixer

show examples

Consequently

passed

Correct article usage

the passed

show examples

substance from

mixer

Add an article

a mixer

the mixer

show examples

will

putted

Verb problem

be put

show examples

rotating

Correct article usage

a rotating

show examples

heater, where it will heated by fire. Before packing into packages the

cement

, the almost ready material

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

passed from

heater

Add an article

the heater

show examples

will recycled by

grinder

Add an article

the grinder

a grinder

show examples

Correct word choice

and than

show examples

than

Replace the word

then

show examples

it will be

Remove the article

cement

a block of cement

show examples

cement

Finally

finished

Add an article

the finished

show examples

product will

putted

Verb problem

be put

show examples

into

concrete

Add an article

the concrete

a concrete

show examples

mixer

with materials

such

as sand 25per

cent

Correct your spelling

per cent

show examples

gravel

half of all, water 10 per cent and

lastly

Add a comma

,lastly

show examples

cement

15 per cent.

Furthermore

, it will spin and

mixed

Wrong verb form

mix

show examples

this

stage

, and after

that

Add a comma

,that

show examples

it will be

gravel

which are small stones.

Submitted by dimash171206 on Mon Sep 25 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the sixth paragraph.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words cement, gravel, stage, mixer with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the sixth paragraph.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

157 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

construction
cement-making
raw materials
crushing
mixing
heating
grinding
cement powder
packaging
distribution
concrete
versatility
strength
aggregate

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The diagrams below show the stages and equipment used in the cement-making process, and how cement is used to produce concrete for building purposes.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Rich people are getting richer, and poor people are getting poorer. What are the causes? What can be done to reduce this gap?

Some peope believe that longer prison sentences are the best way to decrease crime while others believe that there are alternative ways to decrease crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sum of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The majority of news is being reported bad news such as wars famines, accidents and crime. Why do you think that is? Do you think news should be balance of good news and bad news?

Many people believe that social networking websites such as FB and Instagram have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?