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Some people believe that culture will be ruined if it is used to earn tourism revenue, but others consider that tourism is the only way of protecting culture.Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

#people #culture #tourism #revenue
People
 consider that earning
tourism
 income may ruin the
culture
,
while
 some individuals argue that there are none of methods to preserve
culture
 except
tourism
. In my opinion, I agree that
culture
 can be protected by the tourist industry. The statement
of
Change preposition
that
show examples
 the revenue of
tourism
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 ruining the
culture
 is the result of
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
 behaviours
to
Change preposition
toward
show examples
 the environment and
culture
.
That is
 true because some
people
 might react offensively to the
religous
Correct your spelling
religion
 or
culture
 of a particular place or they don't care about the rules of the
places
Fix the agreement mistake
place
show examples
 which
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
 to a vast destruction of
culture
, and
also
 make the beauty of the
people
, place, and
culture
 fade away.
On the other hand
, some
people
 and I do agree that there are some benefits of
tourism
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
 protect the
culture
. To explain, if the
tourism
 of a country or a place is up to standard and is in the state of art, it can bring the local
people
 huge income from visitors.
For example
, they can build more accommodations and provide more facilities to the
traveler
Fix the agreement mistake
travelers
show examples
 so that they won't feel uncomfortable
hence
 they can enjoy the experience of
culture
 more profoundly. In conclusion, some
people
 believe that
culture
 will be ruined if it is used to earn
tourism
 revenue, but others and I consider that
tourism
 is the only way of protecting
culture
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
not
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
ruining it.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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