:Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
The majority of
government
enunciate the idea Correct article usage
the government
of
making progress in economic growth Change preposition
that
are
extremely beneficial, Correct subject-verb agreement
is
while
a number of people are supportive of other types of progress. I Linking Words
believed
that both Wrong verb form
believe
idea
are essential and should be considered without Change to a plural noun
ideas
been
biased.
Wrong verb form
being
Economic
growth of a country Correct article usage
The economic
are
extremely crucial, a beneficial development in infrastructure, education, Change the verb form
is
technology
. Correct word choice
and technology
Likewise
, all other relevant sectors Linking Words
increases
the standard of living, Change the verb form
increase
ensured
happiness and create a well-balanced and productive environment. If the economy create adequate profit via tax from the citizen Wrong verb form
ensure
Linking Words
for
instance, it would aid the authority to provide health insurance. Add the comma(s)
,for
Thus
, ensuring Linking Words
better
scheme Correct article usage
a better
to
Change preposition
for
the
society, generating good health and well-being, Correct article usage
apply
whereas
commencing to more productivity.
On the Linking Words
hand
, there are more crucial significant factors that should be considered. The vital one is ensuring Correct word choice
other hand
flexibility
working hours. Replace the word
flexible
Rule
and Fix the agreement mistake
Rules
regulation
should be developed concerning leave Fix the agreement mistake
regulations
break
from both public and private Fix the agreement mistake
breaks
organization
. A number of citizens engaged in extremely excessive Fix the agreement mistake
organizations
work loads
and ridiculous working hours, without a vacation period from their employers. Encouraging Correct your spelling
workloads
these regulation
will commence Change the determiner
this regulation
these regulations
to
more leisure time and Change preposition
apply
individual
will enjoy their money through mini Add an article
the individual
an individual
vacation
, Fix the agreement mistake
vacations
tour
which could eventually increase Add an article
a tour
the tour
the
Correct article usage
apply
economy
growth, Replace the word
economic
vice
versa.
Correct word choice
and vice
However
, in my Linking Words
opinion
I Add a comma
,opinion
believed
that if all Wrong verb form
believe
Linking Words
this measure
are put in place, environmental sustainability is a necessity as well. Imbalanced ecosystem, global warming, pollution generated from natural Fix the agreement mistake
these measures
resources
exploitation and production waste should be prevented. Without environmental conservation, severe contamination is inevitable, Fix the agreement mistake
resource
Linking Words
this
could result Correct pronoun usage
which
to
various susceptible Change preposition
in
disease
and deteriorating organs. The booming of gold mining in the Fix the agreement mistake
diseases
republic
of Congo Capitalize word
Republic
for example
has Linking Words
commences to
severe environmental pollution, Verb problem
caused
report
has shown that 70% of the population Add an article
the report
a report
are
suffering from Correct subject-verb agreement
is
the
lung and skin cancer.
In conclusion, a country's development Correct article usage
apply
are
paramount, Change the verb form
is
Linking Words
likewise
Add a comma
,likewise
other measure
should be considered for Change the wording
another measure
other measures
Correct pronoun usage
its
it
continuous progress and wealthCorrect pronoun usage
its
Unnecessary verb
apply
being
.Verb problem
apply
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Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example