SOME SAY YOU SHOULD ALWAYS MARR FOR LOVE; OTHERS SAY THAT IN AN UNCERTAIN WORLLD IT IS WISER TO MARRY FOR MONEY. DISCUSS BOTH POINTS OF VIEW AND GIVE YOUR OWN OPINION.

Nowadays
Punctuation problem
Nowadays,
show examples
there are two points of view when it comes to
marriage
Use synonyms
.Some
people
Use synonyms
believe you should always prefer to choose someone that you
love
Use synonyms
to marry,
while
Linking Words
others believe we are living in
a
Correct article usage
an
show examples
uncertain world and we should pick
money
Use synonyms
over
love
Use synonyms
.In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
both sides will be discussed
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
an opinion will be provided in conclusion . On the one hand, there are
people
Use synonyms
who always stick with the person that they
love
Use synonyms
and do not
care
Use synonyms
about their financial income , they believe
marriage
Use synonyms
should not
be depending
Wrong verb form
depend
show examples
on each
others
Check wording
other's
show examples
money
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
the decision
on marrying
Change preposition
to marry
show examples
should
be depending
Wrong verb form
depend
show examples
on how much we
love
Use synonyms
our partners.
For instance
Linking Words
, the popular football player Ronaldo
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
been married
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
a woman who
is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
used to work as a waitress before they got married
her
Punctuation problem
. Her
show examples
income
was depending
Wrong verb form
depended
show examples
on how many
people
Use synonyms
she
has
Verb problem
apply
show examples
served
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
means she was not earning that much
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
this
Linking Words
situation made
people
Use synonyms
believe
ronaldo
Fix capitalization
Ronaldo
show examples
did not
care
Use synonyms
about
money
Use synonyms
and married because he loved her.And a lot of individuals take
this
Linking Words
love
Use synonyms
story as their hope
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
these
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
show examples
of stories make them believe
love
Use synonyms
actually exists.And with the person we
Use synonyms
love
Add a comma
love,
show examples
it can lead us to be
more happy
Correct word choice
happier
show examples
and feel
more safe
Correct word choice
safer
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, others believe
now
Correct word choice
that now
show examples
with
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
uncertainties
Punctuation problem
uncertainties,
show examples
people
Use synonyms
we
love
Use synonyms
can change
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
marriages should be
depending
Wrong verb form
depend
show examples
on financial purposes.To illustrate
there
Punctuation problem
, there
show examples
is
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
research done in 2020 by scientists that
been
Verb problem
has
show examples
proved
Use the right word
proven
show examples
88% of our population end their marriages
due to
Linking Words
financial issues.To illustrate, in most cases women do not work so that they can take
care
Use synonyms
of their houses and do chores
such
Linking Words
as cleaning,cooking or even taking
care
Use synonyms
of their children which means that they can not commit on working in other jobs so that they can gain salary and in most cases especially if the couple have a child just the male parent income is not enough so
people
Use synonyms
believe the choice to make on marrying someone should be depending on
money
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, my opinion on the matter is that nowadays it is hard to find the person we
love
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
we should always make a choice
on
Verb problem
based on
show examples
considering
Verb problem
apply
show examples
how much we
love
Use synonyms
our partner.
However
Linking Words
,
money
Use synonyms
is an important factor for
marriage
Use synonyms
in order to sustain a
marriage
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task response
Keep to a clear plan. Answer the question with two sides and end with your own view. Make the final view strong and repeated in the end.
Coherence and cohesion
Use clear links like First, Then, Also, But, So. Make each idea flow to the next one and keep short sentences.
Grammar
Aim for simple grammar. Check long sentences and repeat words. Use correct subject and verb.
Structure
The essay uses clear headings like On the one hand and On the other hand.
Content
It ends with a clear opinion in the last part.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Topic Vocabulary:
  • love
  • money
  • marry
  • marriage
  • partner
  • family
  • home
  • future
  • plan
  • goal
  • time
  • risk
  • safe
  • security
  • support
  • trust
  • care
  • happiness
  • work
  • job
  • income
  • debt
  • save
  • spend
  • choice
  • opinion
  • view
  • balance
  • values
  • child
  • kids
  • education
  • health
  • stable
  • life
  • problem
  • solution
  • good
  • bad
  • strong
  • weak
  • luck
  • chance
What to do next:
Look at other essays: