A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In our Modern world,
people
are quick to jump at equating people
's material belongings to their worth. By so doing, great attributes like integrity, generosity and loyalty are deemed outdated and no longer relevant. I do agree with the initial notion but do not agree with the latter. My essay will elaborate on these.
To begin
with, people
with flashy material possessions are more respected in our modern society. For example
, Wendy Shay, a pop star songstress in Ghana displays affluent lifestyles by posting plush cars, displaying expensive watches and wearing branded clothes to quickly catch the attention of viewers on social media platforms. She has millions of followers and her lifestyle depicts how wealthy she is. People
mostly careless
whether or not what she puts out there is true or not and do not even bother whether she acquired Replace the word
care
such
wealth the genuine way. All they do is believe what they see. Some of her followers even go to the extent of requesting she become their mentor. I somewhat agree with equating one's possessions to their worth because no matter what, we all have a choice to invest in what we wear and own and that is
how some choose to go about theirs.
On the other hand
, most people
place a premium on how others treat them. And so they cherish kind acts of deeds, loyalty and nobility. These are traditional attributes taught to us by our parents. They can never be done away with because no matter how much riches a person has, if he or she is not generous, then
this
person does not benefit society in any way. We all are comfortable around people
with pleasant attitudes. An example is a recent news article on Elon Musk's visit to Ukraine where he made huge donations to the needy. There have been other reports of other influential individuals making donations to orphanages. This
goes to show that even such
people
know the importance of kindness. Hence
, I am of the view that traits of kindness, trust and honour are still invaluable in today's world and do not agree with the fact that they are no longer significant.
To sum up
, I agree material possessions are a way of showing one's worth but, trust, honour and kindness still stand as we all are moved by people
with such
attributes.Submitted by nmaureen03 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the introduction reflects the ideas presented in the body paragraphs. The conclusion should summarize the main points and provide a clear closing statement.
task achievement
The essay provides a complete response to the prompt and presents clear and comprehensive ideas with relevant examples. Ensure that the agreement with the initial notion is clearly stated in the introduction for improved task response.
lexical resource
The lexical resource is varied and includes relevant vocabulary related to the topic. Utilize a wider range of vocabulary to enhance the lexical resource.
grammatical range
The essay demonstrates a good range of grammatical structures with minimal errors. Pay attention to sentence structure and ensure that complex structures are used effectively to enhance the grammatical range.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.
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