Some people think that charity organizations should only help people of their own country. But others believe that these organizations should give aid to people in great need wherever they live. Discuss both views and give your own view.

#people #charity #organizations #country #aid

It is argued that own

country

people

should get priority by fund

organizations

. but

others

think that donation

organizations

should help society who are in great need wherever they live. I will discuss both sides and give some my own opinion in

this

essay.

Firstly

charity

organizations

should help their own nation because you should solve your own problem

first,

then

only you can help

others

For instance

, I have problems and difficulties in my own house obviously I try to sort it out first and it is human nature.

In addition

, if you trying to help

others

and you have the same problem in your

country

and you haven't solved that your own community will talk to

your

Correct pronoun usage

you

show examples

behind and most folk will not believe that you helping by soul. since

charity

organizations

like NGOs should give priority to helping their own

country

people

Secondly

people

believe

charity

organizations

should help not only

own

Correct pronoun usage

their own

show examples

country

people

but

also

help

Verb problem

apply

show examples

extremely needy folk or communities.

For example

, the UN is an organization from the United States and

this

group helps

people

all over the world.

In addition

, the UN is helping mostly African countries because these countries are facing huge crises and have so many problems in terms of serving lives.

For example

, in some African countries'

people

do not have food and water to survive and they living because the UN is providing them with food

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

water and

also

Rephrase

apply

show examples

health facilities.

Therefore

, it is important to help great needy

people

doesn't matter which

country

they are from. And UN is doing great work and is able to be recognised in the world as the best

country

. In conclusion,

charity

organizations

should help great needy

people

whether they are from their own

country

or another. We should help

others

to survive in

this

world.

Submitted by gelbu2021 on Thu Sep 28 2023

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Improvement

Try to improve your grammar and punctuation. Avoid run-on sentences and use proper capitalization.

Improvement

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Improvement

Try to present the arguments in a more clear and concise manner. Too much repeating can make it seem like you're not fully engaging with the topic.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

305 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that charity organizations should only help people of their own country. But others believe that these organizations should give aid to people in great need wherever they live. Discuss both views and give your own view.

Littering in cities is an increasing problem which needs to be dealt with. Some people think that steeper fines is the best way to deal with the problem. To what extent do you agree?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctors. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

In recent years some countries have experienced very rapid economic developement.This has resulted in much higher standards of living in urban areas but not in the country side.This situation may bring some problems for the country as a whole. what are these problems? How might they be reduced?

What are the advantages and disadvantages of leaving your country to live or study abroad?

some people think that only the government can make significant changes in society, while others think that individuals can have a lot of influence. what is your opinion?