Mrs Barrett, an English-speaking woman who lives in your town, has advertised for someone to help her in her home for a few hours a day next summer. Write a letter to Mrs Barrett. In your letter: • suggest how you could help her in her home • say why you would like to do this work • explain when you will and will not be available

#mrs #barrett #woman #lives #town #someone #home #hours #summer #work

Dear Mrs Brrette, Kindly, regarding your advertisement, I am writing

this

letter to you. Since you are not an Iranian person,

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

many people in our

neighborhood

Change the spelling

neighbourhood

show examples

could not understand or speak English fluently. So I can help you in your house

held in

Verb problem

with

show examples

some activities that I am able to do

such

as cooking and cleaning.

For example

, I can cook your lunch and bake a cake if you wish because I am keen

Change preposition

show examples

cooking and it is interesting for me to show you Iranian food through helping.

On the other hand

, I can clean your living room and change the decoration, which is easy for me, since I am studying home

designing

Replace the word

design

show examples

and

this

summer I have

Remove the article

apply

show examples

plenty of free time to practice on my latest course in

this

work.

Furthermore

, it would pleasure for me to

aim

Verb problem

hire

show examples

a foreign lady who

need

Change the verb form

needs

show examples

help. As you have not mentioned which hours in a day would be needed for you, please inform me about it because I

take a place

Wrong verb form

am taking

show examples

an English course and need to be informed about it. My class is every odd day from 9 a.m. to 10:30 a.m. In the end, if you are interested, and want me to do

you

Correct pronoun usage

your

show examples

house work

Correct your spelling

housework

show examples

please

replay

Correct your spelling

show examples

this

Change preposition

to this

show examples

email and send your mobile number to keep in touch. Best Regards, Yasaman Moghadam

Submitted by badrijalali on Fri Sep 29 2023

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

227 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Domestic chores
Culinary skills
Horticulture
Cultural immersion
Work ethic
Flexible schedule
Time management
Prior commitments
Punctuality
Reliability

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