Two-part question Many people prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced films. Why could this be? Should governments give more financial support to local film industries?

#people #films #*why #be #*should #governments #support #film #industries

It is true that nowadays by improving modern technologies, it is interesting to watch foreign

films

rather than locally filmed

films

Overall

, I would say that it

caused

Add a missing verb

is caused

show examples

by the people and might be by

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

however

, in the future

local

Correct article usage

the local

show examples

country’s

films

might uplifted. There are several arguments why

this

could be. One of the main

reason

Fix the agreement mistake

reasons

show examples

is not modern countries or

in other words

not improved countries. Because for filming

movies

country

Add an article

the country

a country

show examples

should have modified technologies,

equipments

Change the wording

equipment

types of equipment

pieces of equipment

show examples

and so on.

Whereas

, my country

have

Add a missing verb

does have

show examples

not any kinds of technologies, huge buildings

e.t.c

Correct your spelling

etc

For instance

according to

the sayings of experts

being

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

like China or

United

Correct article usage

the United

show examples

States of

America

Add a comma

,America

show examples

my country should work, build,

improve

Correct word choice

and improve

show examples

approximately

Change preposition

for approximately

show examples

20 years.

Therefore

majority of

locally

Change the adverb

local

show examples

people

Wrong verb form

choose

show examples

chose

Add the particle

tochose

show examples

watch foreign

films

. There is

also

one huge problem

about

Change preposition

with

show examples

financial support. In

local

Correct article usage

the local

show examples

area

Add a comma

,area

show examples

government

give

Add a missing verb

does give

show examples

not enough

money

for filming scenes. The organisers of

movies

find

money

Add an article

the money

show examples

for

own

Correct pronoun usage

their own

show examples

films

, and

definitely

Add a comma

,definitely

show examples

it is not enough.

According to

the statistics of Kazakhstan in

last

Correct article usage

the last

show examples

2022 year just over 80

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

people

Change preposition

of people

show examples

filmed for

own

Correct pronoun usage

their own

show examples

money

only

Correct word choice

and only

show examples

for approximately 20

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

films

Change preposition

of films

show examples

government

gave

Wrong verb form

give

show examples

money

Moreover

, because

movies

were

Change preposition

apply

show examples

historical, which is not interesting

rather

Correct word choice

but rather

show examples

foreign.

Consequently

, if it

continue

Change the verb form

continues

show examples

, in Kazakhstan there will not quite good

films

furthermore

the industry will not grow. In conclusion, there were reasons

about

Change preposition

for

show examples

foreign and

locally

Change the word

local

show examples

films

. Taking everything mentioned into account in our final, analysis we can say that the

government

should support

industry

Add an article

the industry

an industry

show examples

films

moreover

, organisers should film action,interesting

movies

Submitted by aikumarbekarys on Wed Oct 04 2023

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
37Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

257 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: <4

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: <4

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Two-part question Many people prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced films. *Why could this be? *Should governments give more financial support to local film industries?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that the use of mobiles (cell) phones should be banned in public places such as in libraries, shops and on public transport. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many cities have installed cameras in public places in order to reduce crime. However, some people think that those cameras restrict our privacy. Do you think the advantages of this system outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that old buildings should be replaced with more modern ones. Other people argue that we should protect old buildings because they have special value. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

Two-part question Many people prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced films. Why could this be? Should governments give more financial support to local film industries?