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Writing Samples /
Band 4

You missed an international flight due to a problem at the airport. Write a letter to the airline. In your letter: •Describe what happened that caused you to miss your flight • Explain how missing your flight impacted you • Clearly state what you would like the airline to do

#flight #airport #airline #•describe
It is Sarvinoz,
This
 year, On December 22, I get into the flight of 606, seating number 22. But, the Drivers of not pay attention,and
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 missed flying. The reason cause of the missing, Suddenly,
I
Correct word choice
that I
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suddenly had a headache, So, I purchased tablets,
Moreover
, my nephew got short of air. He behaved himself badly. After feeling
himself
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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relaxed and good, we decided to enter inside. In spite of arriving here on time. But, One of the airline's staff did not allow access.
This
 impacts me to basic meetings between two companies.
As a result
, Many people remain workless. If we had signed the contract, we would have made a huge profit.
The most
Correct article usage
Most
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staffs
Fix the agreement mistake
staff
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 are too sad
from
Change preposition
for
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 me. Now
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 could not find or work out
to
Change preposition
apply
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the situation. I am not thrilled
of
Change preposition
with
show examples
 your
unknowingly
Change the adverb
unknowing
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 work. I am writing that the airline must pay back my payment as fast as possible. Yours faithfully: Sarvinoz.
Submitted by sarvinozjumayeva813 on

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coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your letter is unclear. You should start with a proper introduction, then provide a clear description of what happened, explain the impact on you, and state your request.
coherence cohesion
Your greeting and closing are not appropriate for a formal letter. You should use 'Dear' followed by the airline's name and end with 'Yours sincerely' or 'Yours faithfully'.
coherence cohesion
You have combined multiple ideas in some paragraphs. It is better to have one main idea per paragraph to improve clarity and coherence.
task achievement
You have not fully addressed all the points in the prompt. Make sure to clearly describe what happened, explain the impact on you, and state your request.
task achievement
Your writing tone is not suitable for a formal letter. Use more polite and formal language throughout the letter.

The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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