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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The world of work rapidly changes and employees cannot depend on the same job and working conditions for life. Give causes for rapid changes and suggest some ways for people to prepare for their future.

Changing work
pattern
Fix the agreement mistake
patterns
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 or assignment careers is now increasing because of
same
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the same
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job
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 and the same working conditions makes
peoples
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people
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 bored. I will discuss the causes and suggest some ways for
people
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 to prepare for their future.
To begin
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 with, obviously peoples could feel bored, doing the same
job
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 and in the same sector because
people
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 wants to explore various careers and learn new things
as well as
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 they want to earn more money.
In addition
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, we work for money and it will help us to achieve our future dreams.
Therefore
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,
People
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 always look for opportunities to get a better
job
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. Since, without ,money it is impossible to help our family we have to take care of our children and fulfil their dreams.
For example
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, if I have a good salary I can do whatever I want to do like I can buy my favourite car and big house which is my dream in life.
Secondly
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,
people
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 are leaving their current jobs because workers gain knowledge and experience and they want to explore their knowledge and gain more experience
therefore
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, it will help to get higher positions
so
Correct word choice
apply
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it gives them more respect in their workplace which they can not get if they stay in same company.
For instance
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, my wife was working in a supermarket as an assistant manager, when she changed companies is got
position
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the position
a position
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 of store manager.
Therefore
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, it gives her more respect
as well as
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 more payment. So my suggestion is always to look for better
opportunity
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opportunities
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 as much as possible but before ,that you have to gain more knowledge and experience in your current
job
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. In conclusion,
people
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 looking for better opportunities nowadays because employees want to get more pay and a better future. So it helps fulfil their dreams.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear and logical structure throughout the essay. Use paragraphs to organize ideas.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your ideas.
lexical resource
Expand your vocabulary and use a wider range of vocabulary to enhance your essay.
grammatical range accuracy
Pay attention to grammar and sentence structure to improve clarity.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Rapid changes
  • Depend
  • Job
  • Working conditions
  • Advancements
  • Technology
  • Globalization
  • Consumer demands
  • Economic fluctuations
  • Competition
  • Automation
  • Artificial intelligence
  • Skills mismatch
  • Job insecurity
  • Lifelong learning
  • Transferable skills
  • Network
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Self-employment
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