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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graphs below show data on Australian trades with three other countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The graphs below show data on Australian trades with three other countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#graphs #show #data #australian #trades #three #countries #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The line graphs illustrate information about
Australia
Use synonyms
’s level of
imports
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 and exports with
China
Use synonyms
,
Japan
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, and the United
States
Use synonyms
 from 2002 to 2008.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is readily apparent from the graphs that
Australia
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 exported more to the United
States
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 and
Japan
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 than that of its
imports
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.
However
Linking Words
, the bilateral
trade
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 between
Australia
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 and
China
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 followed a different trend.
Although
Linking Words
Australia
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’s
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export
Fix the agreement mistake
exports
show examples
 to
Japan
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 began at 40 and remained stable until 2005,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 reached
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 peak
61
Change preposition
of 61
show examples
 in 2006, followed by a steady decline to around 50 in 2008.
However
Linking Words
, when it comes to
trade
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 with the United
States
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,
Australia
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’s
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export
Fix the agreement mistake
exports
show examples
 always remained double (40) than that of its
Use synonyms
import
Fix the agreement mistake
imports
show examples
 (20) and stayed stable until 2006, when both
imports
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 and exports started rising gradually.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Linking Words
initially
Add a comma
,initially
show examples
Australia
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 exported more (40) to
China
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 than that of its
imports
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 (30), and the
export
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 remained the dominant player until 2008 when the level of
Use synonyms
import
Fix the agreement mistake
imports
show examples
 from
China
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 exceeded that of the
export
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 and kept rising
sharp
Change the word
sharply
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. In fact,
this
Linking Words
 bilateral
trade
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 surplus for
Australia
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 reached
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
its maximum in 2005 when the amount of
import
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 plummeted to
the
Change the word
its
show examples
 lowest point (20.)
Finally
Linking Words
, the
trade
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 with the United
States
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 was mostly stable with
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
consistent
Change the word
consistently
show examples
 higher
Use synonyms
export
Fix the agreement mistake
exports
show examples
, with
Japan
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 it went through an unstable
export
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 dominance, but in the end,
Australia
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 failed to restrain the steep rise of
import
Use synonyms
 from
China
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.
Submitted by quynhtranhbh on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words imports, china, japan, states, australia, trade, export, import with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graphs" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stable" was used 3 times.
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