Some people believe that studying at university or collge is the best route to a soccessful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job staight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

#people #university #collge #route #soccessful #career #job #staight #school

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There is an increasingly popular idea that the best way to a successful career is studying at a university or college.

While

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others think that getting a

job

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straight after

school

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is more effective. Both opinions may have benefits and drawbacks from

this

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trend, from my point of view, I think that getting a

job

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right after graduation is more useful. On the one hand, there is a variety of reasons why

people

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have a tendency to choose to continue their education after

school

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First,

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a college education will provide young

people

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with the necessary qualifications, which are needed to have a good

job

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in many companies. Having a college will probably get a much higher salary than those without a university education.

Furthermore

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, the

job

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market is becoming more and more competitive. Having a degree is a standard term to get the top jobs.

For example

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, graduated engineers and programmers in Vietnam are highly paid and easy to get a top

job

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On the other hand

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, I believe that working straight after high

school

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is beneficial in some ways.

Firstly

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, young

people

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are able to earn money as soon as possible. So that they can live independently on their own income, which can prove one’s maturity.

Secondly

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, youngsters who choose to work right after leaving high

school

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will have more experience, which help them work effectively and know how to choose a suitable

job

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in the future,

such

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as a career requiring a high standard of soft skills and attitude. In conclusion,

although

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studying

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show examples

university will give me more knowledge and allow young

people

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to get a well-paid career, I contend that getting a gap year for work or travelling right after graduation will provide more experience and Skills to deal with problems in real-life tasks.

Submitted by phamnhung275 on Wed Oct 04 2023

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Introduction and Conclusion

Provide a stronger introduction and conclusion to clearly state your opinion and summarize your main points.

Content

Expand on your main points and provide more specific examples to support your arguments.

Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure that your ideas are logically structured and presented in a cohesive manner.

Lexical Resource

Consider using a wider range of vocabulary to enhance your essay.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

Check your grammar and sentence structures for accuracy.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

298 words

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Some people believe that studying at university or collge is the best route to a soccessful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job staight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own

Topic: Many people believe that media coverage of celebrities is having a negative effect on children. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. However, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Advertising has become an unavoidable part of everyone’s life. Some say that advertising is a positive part of our lives while others say it is a negative one. Discuss both views and include your own opinion.

Topic : children are facing more pressures nowadays from academic, social and commercial perspectives. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures?