Many people working longer hours, leaving little time for leisure activities. What are the advantages and disadvantages..

#people #hours #time #leisure #activities

People

need to

work

and earn money

for

Change preposition

show examples

sustain their

life

and to take care of their

family

Fix the agreement mistake

families

show examples

This

essay will give some information about advantages and disadvantages.

Firstly

, we might say that

people

must

work

On the other hand

, they have

own

Correct pronoun usage

their own

show examples

life

and family. That's why, they should spend

time

their

Change preposition

with their

show examples

friends,

family

Correct word choice

and family

show examples

and spend

time

for

Change preposition

show examples

their leisure activities. Hardworking is

advantage

Add an article

an advantage

show examples

for

earn

Change the verb form

earning

show examples

good

Add an article

a good

show examples

salary.

Besides

that, if you

work

a lot you can take a good wage from your company.

Furthermore

, it would be higher your

life

standart

Correct your spelling

standard

This

is very complicate

Change the verb form

is very complicated

show examples

situation for workers who are struggling with

this

However

, governments have

an official rules

Correct the article-noun agreement

an official rule

official rules

show examples

about

work

hours. If employers

make

Verb problem

put

show examples

Remove the article

apply

show examples

pressure

Change preposition

show examples

staff, they need to

Verb problem

make

show examples

addition

Replace the word

additional

show examples

payment

Fix the agreement mistake

payments

show examples

On the other hand

, many

people

like doing

activites

Correct your spelling

activities

for their

life

and

life

standart

Correct your spelling

standards

. When workers take a spare

time

they will be more active and useful.

Moreover

, events help

Change preposition

apply

show examples

people

relieve stress and become

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

outgoing

person

Fix the agreement mistake

people

show examples

According to

researchers,

people

are

Verb problem

show examples

not contribute

for

Change preposition

show examples

their place

who

Correct word choice

and

show examples

avoid

spend

Change the verb form

spending

show examples

time

out of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

work

This

information

gives to

Verb problem

shows

show examples

us,

leisure

Correct word choice

that leisure

show examples

is more important than

work

. In summary, especially companies have to present

option

Fix the agreement mistake

options

show examples

about

work

hours. Some

people

prefer to

work

long hours and

reasonable

Correct article usage

a reasonable

show examples

salary.

In contrast

, many

people

use their

cahce

Correct your spelling

cache

another options

Replace the adjective

another option

other options

show examples

such

as free

time

excersice

Correct your spelling

exercise

or outreach events. It shows that we can not say any

spesicfic

Correct your spelling

specific

comment

Fix the agreement mistake

comments

show examples

about

this

situation. It depends on

people

life style

Correct your spelling

lifestyle

show examples

Submitted by ozanakbulutweb on Wed Oct 04 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
38Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

253 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: <4

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: <4

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

burnout
work-life balance
productivity
financial gain
career advancement
skill development
personal fulfillment
physical health
mental health
social life
quality of life
neglect
leisure activities

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Many people working longer hours, leaving little time for leisure activities. What are the advantages and disadvantages..

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many countries, people wear more western-style clothes (suits and jeans) than their traditional clothes. Why is this the case? Is it a positive or negative development?

Many drinks and ready meals contain a lot of sugar, salt and other non healthy ingredients. Do you think governments should try and control this development? Give reasons for your answer.

Some people say that drug companies have a responsibility to spend money on researching medicines that will help people in poorer countries. Others say the main responsibility of drug companies is to make money. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

A healthy person is often described as someone who has a good diet, gets plenty of exerciseand avoids stress.What should people do to stay healthy in your country? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.