Art is considered an important part of a society as well as an expression of its culture. Do you think it is important for children to be taught art? Do you think children should be encouraged to focus on art rather than other subjects?

#art #part #society #expression #culture #children #focus #subjects

Nowadays

art

plays a significant role in society. It is often argued that

art

should be taught at

schools

while

others believe that focusing on main

subjects

would be better

Change preposition

for

show examples

children

Change noun form

children's

show examples

progress.

Firstly

schools

should cover all

subjects

in order to outgrow open

minded

Correct word choice

open-minded

show examples

population. To be more specific, every subject has its own importance which can

led

Change the verb form

lead

show examples

to magnificent progress. It is observed that detecting talent sometimes can

be appear

Change the verb form

appear

show examples

just by inspiration

Change preposition

from

show examples

a teacher especially if it is a

favorite

Change the spelling

favourite

show examples

one for students.

Additionally

who

Correct determiner usage

those who

show examples

are good at

art

are considered

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

gifted people by God. As an obvious example, average statistics show that some humans are good at expressing themselves via

art

rather than by using a language. So,

first

Change the article

the first

show examples

step of education starts at school as well there have to

educated

Add a missing verb

be educated

show examples

not only main

subjects

but

also

other

subjects

namely

art

, music etc.

On the other hand

generally

Add a comma

generally,

show examples

pupils are examined by more important

subjects

such

as math, English, chemistry and so on. To be more precise, higher education’s admission process is conducted through the exam which is based on more academic knowledge than

art

Therefore

, parents sometimes can encourage their kids to focus on necessary

subjects

however

, it does not mean

than

Correct word choice

that

show examples

they should be avoided from

art

completely.

Schools

and other education

centers

Change the spelling

centres

show examples

should provide

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

all spheres of

learning

Add an article

the learning

show examples

process.

To sum up

, I strongly support that

art

should be taught and encouraged at all

kind

Fix the agreement mistake

kinds

show examples

schools

and courses. It is proven that

art

can ignite a light in

person’s

Correct article usage

a person’s

show examples

life and motivate

Correct pronoun usage

them for

show examples

for doing

Change preposition

to do

show examples

their best in all stages of life.

Submitted by fidansariyeva74 on Wed Oct 04 2023

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task achievement

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coherence cohesion

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lexical resource

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grammatical range accuracy

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Your opinion

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

273 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Art is considered an important part of a society as well as an expression of its culture. Do you think it is important for children to be taught art? Do you think children should be encouraged to focus on art rather than other subjects?

Your opinion

Computers are being used more and more in education. Some people say that this is a positive trend, while others argue that it is leading to negative consequences. Discuss both sides of this argument and then give your own opinion.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this case? Do you think this iş a positive or negatife development

Fatherhood ought to be emphasised as much as motherhood. The idea that women are solely responsible for deciding whether or not to have babies leads on to the idea that they are also responsible for bringing the children up.

Some people think that increasing communication usage of computers and mobile phones by young people has had a negative effect on their reading and writing skills. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Getting promotions is one of the biggest drives for people to apply themselves and work hard in the modern workplace. Why do you think people are so driven to get promotion? What other factors influence people to work hard?