IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #crime #prison #sentences #alternative
The issue of how to effectively reduce
crime
rates
 is a subject of ongoing debate in many societies. Some individuals advocate for longer
prison
sentences
 as the most suitable method,
while
 others argue that alternative approaches are more effective. In
this
 essay, I will explore both perspectives and provide my own viewpoint. On one side of the argument, proponents of longer
prison
sentences
 argue that they serve as a strong deterrent against criminal
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
. The logic behind
this
 view is that if potential
offenders
 are aware of the severe consequences they may face, they would think twice before committing a
crime
.
Moreover
, extended incarceration removes criminals from society, preventing them from engaging in
further
 criminal activities during their
prison
 terms.
However
, those who support alternative methods to reduce
crime
 emphasize that longer
prison
sentences
 are not always the most effective solution. Research has shown that simply increasing the duration of
sentences
 does not necessarily lead to a significant
reduction
 in
crime
rates
. Many
offenders
, especially those involved in non-violent crimes, may not be deterred by the threat of longer imprisonment.
Instead
, they argue for strategies
such
 as community rehabilitation programs, education, and job training for
offenders
, which aim to address the root causes of criminal
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
. In my opinion,
while
 longer
prison
sentences
 may have a place in the criminal justice system for particularly dangerous
offenders
, they should not be the sole focus of
crime
reduction
 efforts. A holistic approach that combines punishment, rehabilitation, and prevention is likely to yield better results. By addressing the underlying factors that lead to criminal
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
,
such
 as poverty, lack of education, and substance abuse, society can work towards a long-term
reduction
 in
crime
rates
. In conclusion, the debate over reducing
crime
 through longer
prison
sentences
 versus alternative methods is complex.
While
 some argue that longer
sentences
 act as a strong deterrent, others contend that they may not be the most effective means of
crime
reduction
. I believe that a balanced approach, which includes a focus on rehabilitation and addressing the root causes of
crime
, offers a more promising path towards reducing
crime
rates
 and creating safer communities.
Submitted by vyshu.bakkiam on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Include a clear thesis statement in the introduction.
task achievement
Provide specific examples to support your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Ensure the essay has a clear introduction and conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: