Parents, usually mothers, stay at home to look after their families. People believe that for this they should receive a salary from the government. Do you agree or disagree and why?

#parents #mothers #home #families #people #salary #government

Many individuals believe that the government should pay the

parents

, especially mothers because they take

care

of their families and kids and spend time with them at home. I totally disagree with

this

statement and give my opinions in a

further

essay.

To begin

, one of the most significant reasons is the emotional bond between the

parents

and their wards. To elaborate,

Parents

do not

care

about their loved ones for money and for any other essential things, which makes the relationship materialistic. They

care

because they

love

and are emotionally attached to them. It's the duty and right of every parent to

love

and

care

for their

children

For instance

, My

parents

love

and

care

for me a lot without any expectations and things.

As a result

, materialistic things may decrease the bond between the families and the individuals.

Furthermore

, many poor people in the country

also

watch over their kinders. It is in the culture and the traditions of the country to respect elders and

love

small ones. To explain

this

children

learn what they see. If

parents

love

them and respect elders, they

also

do the same with their upcoming generation.

For example

, I want to live

together with

parents

and want to fulfil their desires because I learnt all

this

from them.

Hence

, it develops the moral and ethical values in the

children

Overall

Although

it's a duty for

parents

to look after their families and kids,

children

should

also

respect and

love

them.

Moreover

, it creates a peaceful environment and people can live a happy life.

Submitted by maneethans32 on Fri Oct 06 2023

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coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are not clearly stated. Make sure to clearly state your position on the topic in the introduction and summarize your main points in the conclusion.

task achievement

Use more specific examples to support your ideas.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

262 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Parents, usually mothers, stay at home to look after their families. People believe that for this they should receive a salary from the government. Do you agree or disagree and why?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

These days the fashion in clothing are constantly changing. Is this affecting Individuals and the environment in a positive or a negative way