IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some experts believe that when a country is already rich, any additional increase in economic wealth does not make its citizens any more satisfied. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#experts #country #wealth #citizens
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Some experts believe that when a
country
Use synonyms
 is already rich, any additional increase in economic wealth does not make its citizens
anymore
Rephrase
more
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 satisfied. In general, there are a lot of
transforms
Replace the word
transformations
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 in citizens ' lives. We may have more crimes and
cue-side
Verb problem
crime scenes
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 all over the town.
Firstly
Linking Words
 , all world
people
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has
Change the verb form
have
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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different life and properties than other.
This
Linking Words
 could affect poor
people
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 having water, food,
cloth
Correct your spelling
clothes
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, education and
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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other important essentials.
Secondly
Linking Words
, there will be more homeless
for example
Linking Words
 in the USA some youth just live in
there
Replace the word
their
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 own car,
Correct word choice
and in
show examples
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
the
Correct your spelling
this
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 reason, they do not have enough money to buy
the
Correct article usage
a
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 house,
however
Linking Words
, they just buy
the
Correct article usage
a
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 car and
ran
Wrong verb form
run
show examples
 out of money. So they just go anywhere they like, sleep in
there
Replace the word
their
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 car and do not have any home.
Linking Words
While
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 poor
people
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 cannot do anything because there
changes
Add a missing verb
are changes
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 just for rich
people
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 and there will be more poor
people
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 than past.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some
people
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 think the opposite. They think that they might afford their own money. The reason is that there can be
a bad financial conditions
Correct the article-noun agreement
a bad financial condition
bad financial conditions
show examples
 in the
country
Use synonyms
.
People
Use synonyms
 in that
country
Use synonyms
 should be satisfied
about
Change the preposition
with
show examples
 any changes by the government or any additional increase for the economiceconomis wealth. Citizens think that
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
country
Use synonyms
 is
alreadycountry
Correct your spelling
already country
 already rich, so any additional increase just be
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
leftover for them.
Overall
Linking Words
, a lot of changes are being right now and the
changed
Replace the word
changes
show examples
about
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the social level of
rich
Correct article usage
the rich
show examples
 and poor will be more clear than ever.
Submitted by Thanh on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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