One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you yhink the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
this
Linking Words
contamporary
Correct your spelling
contemporary
era, technological advancement brings the bright side in the medical aspects, as
due to
Linking Words
improved medical facilities life
expectency
Correct your spelling
expectancy
of individuals are increasing and
people
Use synonyms
tends
Change the verb form
tend
show examples
to live longer
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
compared
Replace the word
comparison
show examples
to
past
Correct article usage
the past
show examples
, which is
positive
Add an article
a positive
show examples
improvement.
However
Linking Words
, it
also
Linking Words
has some drawbacks. In my opinion,
merits
Correct article usage
the merits
show examples
outweigh the demerits.
This
Linking Words
essay will
disuccus
Correct your spelling
discuss
both the views in ensuing paragraphs. To commence with, it is an inevitable fact that medical systems nowadays are far better than
traditional
Correct article usage
the traditional
show examples
era.
Due to
Linking Words
advancement
Fix the agreement mistake
advancements
show examples
in
technology
Add a comma
technology,
show examples
people
Use synonyms
can easily get
cure
Fix the agreement mistake
cures
show examples
from
Change preposition
for
show examples
any kind of
diseases
Fix the agreement mistake
disease
show examples
such
Linking Words
as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
cancer,
tumors
Change the spelling
tumours
show examples
, etc.
Besides
Linking Words
, it
also
Linking Words
heps
Correct your spelling
helps
show examples
individual to work
untill
Correct your spelling
until
late
Correct article usage
a late
show examples
age to keep their selves active and
illness free
Add a hyphen
illness-free
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
, in developed
countries
Add a comma
countries,
show examples
people
Use synonyms
are working up to
age
Add an article
the age
show examples
of 60 and they are fit as a fiddle
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
which
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
them to become independent
along with
Linking Words
stress
free
Correct article usage
a free
show examples
life. Turning to the other side of the spectrum,
Incresing life-expectency
Correct your spelling
increasing life expectancy
leads to one disadvantage.
For example
Linking Words
,
recent
Correct article usage
a recent
show examples
investigation shows that with an increased number of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
we will soon witness dramatic issues
such
Linking Words
as
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
poverty and lack of enough resources to live. In conclusion, to
retirate
Correct your spelling
reiterate
my opinion, by introducing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
new means of medical treatment to the citizens of
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
certain country will boost the satisfactory rate of
longer-life
Correct your spelling
longer life
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
,we can not deny the fact that welfare of the society will decrease unless
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
take steps towards
this
Linking Words
issue. All in
all
Add a comma
all,
show examples
pros
assiociated
Correct your spelling
associated
with
this
Linking Words
subject outweigh the cons.
Submitted by joshiami7570 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • longevity
  • life expectancy
  • demographic shifts
  • elderly
  • wisdom
  • ageing population
  • healthcare system
  • pensions
  • mentorship
  • innovation
  • assistive technologies
  • cultural dynamics
  • family structures
  • medical advancements
  • quality of life
  • economic sustainability
  • dependency ratio
  • social contributions
  • volunteerism
  • preventative measures
What to do next:
Look at other essays: