Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for lesuire activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Many Individuals have been working extended
hours
Use synonyms
to pursue their
career
Use synonyms
aspirations, sacrificing their
time
Use synonyms
available for engaging in leisure activities.
This
Linking Words
essay will elaborate about the merits and demerits of
this
Linking Words
decision on a routine day. An opinion would be substantiated
at the end
Linking Words
.
To begin
Linking Words
with the merits, there are many benefits associated with working long
hours
Use synonyms
in relation to
career
Use synonyms
growth and experience.
First,
Linking Words
working extended
hours
Use synonyms
would allow a person to complete the task that they are engaged in, with the expected level of proficiency because of the availability of extra
time
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, working long
hours
Use synonyms
in relation to performing different job tasks at workplace, gives the opportunity to gain additional work experience.
Hence
Linking Words
, increasing the demand for an individual in the corporate world as they progress in their
career
Use synonyms
. For an example: - An individual gaining a diversified experience by working long
hours
Use synonyms
in different departments
such
Linking Words
as IT and Finance, would help to develop a
career
Use synonyms
in FinTech,
this
Linking Words
can be rewarding in terms of money.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there is always an opportunity cost with
this
Linking Words
decision.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
will limit the
time
Use synonyms
availability for an individual to spend with their family and loved ones.
Thus
Linking Words
, leading to a poor quality of life.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
can impact an individual’s relationship with their loved ones.
Secondly
Linking Words
, having an unbalanced work-life would lead to many health complexities. Thereby, leading to a risk of loss of life. For an instance: - A research report has stated that there is a positive correlation between increased number of life-threatening diseases
due to
Linking Words
the limited
time
Use synonyms
available for relaxation. In conclusion, it is important to have a proper work-life balance because health and freedom is a key element of life.
Therefore
Linking Words
, in my opinion the disadvantages outweigh the advantages in terms of working long
hours
Use synonyms
compromising the availability of spare
time
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by isuru.cima on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Task Response: The essay provides a clear discussion of the advantages and disadvantages of working long hours, and concludes with a balanced opinion. However, it would benefit from a more focused approach to directly address the question prompt.
coherence cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: The logical structure of the essay is generally good, with clear introduction and conclusion. The ideas are well-supported with relevant examples. However, there is a need for more cohesive use of linking words and phrases to improve overall coherence.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Lesuire activities
  • Work-life balance
  • Career progression
  • Economic productivity
  • Workaholic
  • Physical health
  • Mental health issues
  • Productivity
  • Work-life imbalance
  • Stress levels
  • Burnout
  • Community involvement
  • Healthcare costs
  • Time management
  • Flexible working hours
  • Quality of life
What to do next:
Look at other essays: