People living in the 21st century have a better life quality than people who lived in previous times . To what extent do you agree or disagree .

It has been observed that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
life
in different periods is distinguished.
Although
some people believe that nowadays
life
property is better than in old times . I agree with the given statement . My inclination is elaborated in ensuring
paragraph
Fix the agreement mistake
paragraphs
show examples
and relevant examples . The foremost argument to justify my stand is that new technology
develop
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develops
show examples
life
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
the better
sides
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side
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.
By contrast
in the middle of the 20th century in
current
Correct article usage
the current
show examples
decade
observed
Verb problem
apply
show examples
numerous devices served not only in government
place
Fix the agreement mistake
places
show examples
also
Correct word choice
but also
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support
Wrong verb form
in supporting
show examples
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
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at home .
For instance
, to wash outfits individuals use their hands spending a lot of energy ,
furthermore
it takes time but washing machines simplify
this
process keeping force and avoiding
squander
Wrong verb form
squandering
show examples
hours .
Moreover
, local surveys by electronics stores in 2004
reinforces
Correct subject-verb agreement
reinforce
show examples
this
standpoint . 93 % of females agree that chores became easier after
purshasing
Correct your spelling
purchasing
devices
also
compared
20
Change preposition
to 20
show examples
years ago women
elude
Verb problem
avoided
show examples
wasting time
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
housework and easily accumulated energy for the family .
On the contrary
, some people
counter claim
Correct your spelling
counterclaim
show examples
the mentioned support . The foremost argument they
do
Verb problem
make
show examples
is
by
Change preposition
that
show examples
developing technology hampers concentration due the social media . Because of that , a concerning issue in today`s society has a negative impact on the young generation .
For example
, the constant stream of information and notifications with platforms like Facebook , Twitter , and Instagram
making
Wrong verb form
makes it
show examples
difficult concentration for humans to stay focused on important tasks .
In addition
,
addictive
Correct article usage
the addictive
show examples
qualities of social media and apparatus interrupt individuals of the beauty of
life
turning people into a mass similar to each other ruining the spirit of human nature . The conclude the discussion , it can be said that despite the fact of harm by technology my reason that devices provide more benefits
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
logically acceptable .
Submitted by elnur.adil on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure the introduction clearly states your position on the topic
coherence cohesion
Provide a clearer concluding statement
task achievement
Develop your main arguments more fully
task achievement
Add more specific examples to support your arguments

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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