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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

the diagram shows how electricity is generated in a hydroelectric power station. summerise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

the diagram shows how electricity is generated in a hydroelectric power station. summerise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#electricity #power #station #summerise #information #features #comparisons
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The provided process diagram represents the stages of electricity generation in a hydroelectric
power
Use synonyms
 station.
overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that
this
Linking Words
 linear process
commencing
Wrong verb form
commences
show examples
 with
water
Use synonyms
 coming from the river into a high-level
Use synonyms
reservior
Correct your spelling
reservoir
 and ending with generating
power
Use synonyms
 in the
power
Use synonyms
 station.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, river
water
Use synonyms
go
Change the verb form
goes
show examples
 to
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
high level
Add a hyphen
high-level
show examples
Use synonyms
reservior
Correct your spelling
reservoir
 closed by a dam at night
time
Use synonyms
 and opened at day
time
Use synonyms
 to intake.
At
Change preposition
In
show examples
day
Correct your spelling
the daytime
show examples
time
Use synonyms
, when the dam
open
Change the verb form
opens
show examples
 the flow of
water
Use synonyms
run
Correct subject-verb agreement
runs
show examples
 to generate electricity by reversible
turbines
Use synonyms
. Meanwhile,
water
Use synonyms
 goes through reversible
turbines
Use synonyms
, which
operates
Correct subject-verb agreement
operate
show examples
generator
Correct article usage
the generator
show examples
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 day
time
Use synonyms
Correct word choice
and than
show examples
than
Replace the word
then
show examples
 go to
low-level
Correct article usage
the low-level
show examples
Use synonyms
reservior
Correct your spelling
reservoir
.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
generator
Add an article
the generator
a generator
show examples
 is connected
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the reversible
turbines
Use synonyms
 in the
power
Use synonyms
 station, which generate
power
Use synonyms
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
that goes to
national
Add an article
the national
show examples
 grid through
power
Use synonyms
 lines. At night
time
Use synonyms
,
water
Use synonyms
 from
low-level
Correct article usage
the low-level
show examples
Use synonyms
reservior
Correct your spelling
reservoir
reservoirs
pumped
Add a missing verb
is pumped
show examples
 by the reversible
turbines
Use synonyms
 and help the
water
Use synonyms
 to flow during pumping into the high-level
Use synonyms
reservior
Correct your spelling
reservoir
.
This
Linking Words
 process
keep
Change the verb form
keeps
show examples
 going and
generate
Correct subject-verb agreement
generates
show examples
power
Use synonyms
 through the generator.
Submitted by sayelacu2011 on

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words power, water, reservior, time, turbines with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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