An increasing number of children are overweight which could result in many problems when they grow older both in terms of their health and health care costs. Why do you think so many children are overweight? What could be done to solve this problem?

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Nowadays, there is a huge number of

children

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who are overweight. In my point of view,

this

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problem might cause lots of results affecting their health and the healthcare cost when they grow up. In my opinion,

children

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being overweight might stem from three prominent factors.

Firstly

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, they eat too much unhealthy food

such

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as fast food, sugary, processed food,

....

Replace the punctuation

...

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For example

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, a

cheese burger

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cheeseburger

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or a pizza causes a high amount of calories or there is a large amount of sugar in soft drinks, and recklessly, they don’t contain any nutrients.

This

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causes obesity and diabetes when they grow up. The second reason is the sedentary lifestyle favoured by a large number of

children

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. They usually spend

time

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playing video games or watching videos. Compared to sports and

exercises

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exercise

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, indoor activities are more in demand.

Besides

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, nowadays,

children

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spend more

time

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studying

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apply

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but forget that the body

also

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needs to be worked. Some schools don’t have

time

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for students to do exercises, and

this

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is a persistent problem. From my personal experience, there are some solutions that can solve the overweight problems. I believe

children

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should adopt a healthier life.

Firstly

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, they should

take

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eat

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nutritious meals.

For instance

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, in every meal, parents can prepare more vegetables and meat without being

fatty

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fat

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Furthermore

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children

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can improve their immune system with fruit and diaries.

Besides

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a nutritious meal,

children

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can have more outdoor activities. By way of illustration, after studying, kids should diminish their

time

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using smartphones and spend more

time

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playing sports. One of the most effective pursuits is walking and cycling. These will help kids improve their health and

also

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control their weight. In conclusion,

although

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Change the article

the

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number of

children

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are

Correct pronoun usage

who are

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overweight is increasing, we should have more solutions about

Fix the agreement mistake

nutrition

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nutritions

Correct your spelling

nutrition

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and

exercises

Fix the agreement mistake

exercise

show examples

to solve

this

Linking Words

khaihuyen68Sat Oct 07 2023

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

296 words

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An increasing number of children are overweight which could result in many problems when they grow older both in terms of their health and health care costs. Why do you think so many children are overweight? What could be done to solve this problem?

All parents want the best opportunities for their children. There are some people who think that school teaches children a skill but others think having a range of subjects is better for the children's future. Discuss both sides.

Dome people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in other countries. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

You visited a hotel last week and left some items behind. Write a letter to the manager stating 1. Details of your stay 2. How important the items are to you 3. How you would want the items to the sent to you

Happiness is considered very important in life. Why is it difficult to define? What factors are important in achieving happiness?

Many companies sponsor sports as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think this is good for the world of sports, while others think there are disadvantages of this. Discuss both sides and give your opinion